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Gay Men

Gay Men and Bottom Shaming (VIDEO)

Matthew J. Dempsey | Posted 05.18.2015 | Gay Voices
Matthew J. Dempsey

2015-05-18-1431962062-5981619-ScreenShot20150518at11small.jpgIn my latest video I break down the psychological nuts and bolts of why we tend to label and judge sexual roles and the gay men who fill them -- pun intended. I describe how this common practice can be limiting, both individually and collectively, as well as what we can do to challenge bottom shaming so that we can all grow, heal, and have better sex. Heels up!

Unzipped Episode 4: 'The Condom Broke' (VIDEO)

Tyler Curry | Posted 05.15.2015 | Gay Voices
Tyler Curry

From condoms breaking to anonymous sex, Zakh, Eric, Ronnie and Anthony talk about what sometimes keeps them up at night and what the actions they can never take back.

The Saga of Grace and Frankie: Redefining Marriage When a Man Comes Out as Gay

Joe Kort, Ph.D. | Posted 05.15.2015 | Gay Voices
Joe Kort, Ph.D.

Chronologically they may be in their 30's, 40's, 50s or 60s, but in "gay years" they are maybe only 15. They have come into their own and are not thinking as an adult about the rest of the people with whom they are in relationship.

Where the Wild Things Aren't

Josh Sabarra | Posted 05.14.2015 | Gay Voices
Josh Sabarra

These days, even finding an online hook-up takes too long.

What Has Happened to the Real Gay Icons?

Alex Hopkins | Posted 05.13.2015 | Gay Voices
Alex Hopkins

The sad truth is that performers who think, and thereby encourage us to think, endanger the dollar, meaning that it's far safer to foster a celebratory attitude towards imbeciles who are fed on an endless diet of schadenfreude and 10-second fame. But the really tragic thing is that as long as we surrender to this malaise.

Unzipped Episode 3: Love and Heartbreak (VIDEO)

Tyler Curry | Posted 05.12.2015 | Gay Voices
Tyler Curry

In the third episode of Unzipped, you find the guys going a little deeper into their sex and dating lives. Watch as Zakh, Eric, Ronnie and the rest of the guys talk about the first time they ever fell in love and what it felt like to have their heart broken in HIV Equal Online's web series about sex, love and HIV.

The Trials of Being Gay and Ginger

Alex Hopkins | Posted 04.23.2015 | Gay Voices
Alex Hopkins

"wWeird" was always how I felt -- from the earliest age -- marked out not only by my acute shyness, but by the color of my hair. The irony was that what I had on my head made me conspicuous -- it suggested I should be bold and dangerous -- the antithesis of my nervy nature and propensity for tears whenever my (ginger) mother left me at the school gate.

My Long Short Road to 50, in Gay Years

David Toussaint | Posted 04.09.2015 | Gay Voices
David Toussaint

If you're fortunate enough to live half a century, you'll understand that it isn't that youth is wasted on the young, it's that youth has no bearing on happiness.

San Francisco Gay Men's Chorus Ushers in the Spring With Passion

Jason Mannino | Posted 04.07.2015 | San Francisco
Jason Mannino

The show presented a selection of extraordinary new works, taking audiences on a voyage across three centuries, and sharing stories of passion as only music can express.

Live Heroically By Claiming Our LGBT Heroic Legacy

John-Manuel Andriote | Posted 04.01.2015 | Gay Voices
John-Manuel Andriote

Our people have left us a powerful, inspiring legacy. But it's up to each of us to claim it for ourselves, to own it and live it. What better time to do that than as we mark the passing over of death and the resurrection -- and triumph -- of life itself?

Looking Being Canceled Is a Loss for the Gay Community

Michael Restiano | Posted 05.27.2015 | Gay Voices
Michael Restiano

I love RuPaul's Drag Race and Modern Family as much as the next gay viewer. But let's be real here: these shows exist to make us smile and laugh. They do not ask us to critically examine our bodies, existence and behaviors.

A Matter of Opinion

Stanley Ely | Posted 05.12.2015 | Gay Voices
Stanley Ely

Why would I have thought that gay men think alike? What gay men have in common is that they're men and are gay. Our tastes run the gamut in movies, food, and clothes, and it turns out in books also.

A Look at the Bond Between Gays and Gals (VIDEO)

Matthew J. Dempsey | Posted 05.10.2015 | Gay Voices
Matthew J. Dempsey

2015-03-09-1425929165-2362682-ScreenShot20150309at3small.jpgIn this video, my love letter to the gay-loving gals of the world, I talk about the psychological and emotional benefits of the special bond that exists between many women and gay men that doesn't limit but only enhances our overall capacity to love.

Being Masculine Doesn't Make You a Top: The Real Problem With Russell Tovey

J Nelson Aviance | Posted 05.05.2015 | Gay Voices
J Nelson Aviance

Second, Tovey isn't just "proud to be masculine," as I've seen some trolls insisting. It isn't "just the way he is" or "who he wants to be." Tovey places a positive moral value on being masculine, and negative value on gay male effeminacy.

A Few Words on Russell Tovey and Why If It Weren't for My Father, I Wouldn't Be a Faggot

Noah Michelson | Posted 05.03.2015 | Gay Voices
Noah Michelson

I was the very embodiment of everything our society worries could go wrong with a little boy, and in my small Midwestern town in the early '80s, I was every father's nightmare awoken and menacingly mincing my way through our local mall's food court.

The Gay Best Friend Must Die

Tré Easton | Posted 04.29.2015 | Gay Voices
Tré Easton

No dear, I don't know why the guy you're into won't text you back. (I still haven't figured that out for my own purposes.) And, for the love of all that is good and HOLY: I am not -- repeat, NOT -- an honorary girl.

Why the CW's 'The Flash' Is a Pretty Great Gay Show

J Nelson Aviance | Posted 04.15.2015 | Gay Voices
J Nelson Aviance

This is a CW show and not Pride & Prejudice. But it is nice to see a classic heroic journey; a 21st century superhero who isn't just a two-dimensional good guy, but struggles with the responsibilities that accompany having superpowers.

WATCH: How To Know When To Move On From Your Relationship

Matthew J. Dempsey | Posted 04.05.2015 | Gay Voices
Matthew J. Dempsey

2015-02-03-ScreenShot20150203at4.00.04AMsmall.jpgIn my latest video on relationships, I speak about how to effectively figure out when it's time to move on from a relationship and how to do it in the name of love. I describe how we can know where our stuff ends and our partner's begins, as well as the unique challenges that can come up for gay men when it comes to drawing the distinction.

The Gay Playground: Welcome Back to the Dollhouse

Jeremy Helligar | Posted 04.04.2015 | Gay Voices
Jeremy Helligar

Being gay, particularly in the big cities so many of us flocked to in order to be among more of our own kind, has become demanding and difficult in a way that has nothing to do with straight people and their brand of homophobia.

Once You're in a Relationship, How Do You Keep Love Alive? (VIDEO)

Matthew J. Dempsey | Posted 03.29.2015 | Gay Voices
Matthew J. Dempsey

2015-01-24-matthewdempseykeepinglovealivesmall.jpgRelationships can feel incredible at the start and quickly turn heated or bland at best. All we want is to just reclaim the love we once felt, but something that seems so simple can feel like moving mountains.

Finding Love: How You Can Get Ready (VIDEO)

Matthew J. Dempsey | Posted 03.22.2015 | Gay Voices
Matthew J. Dempsey

2015-01-17-matthewjdempseyfindinglovesmall.jpgStruggling to meet the right person and have a relationship that clicks for the long haul? You've dated enough to get a sense of what you're after, yet you keep coming up against the same relationship issues and beating your head against the wall.

Grindr in the Bible Belt

Nick Weaver | Posted 03.15.2015 | Gay Voices
Nick Weaver

Being known as a "gay-friendly" city in the bible belt is like being known for having a lot of lemonade in a place where everyone hates lemonade.

A Look at the Psychology of Why You're Attracted to the People You Want to Date

Matthew J. Dempsey | Posted 03.15.2015 | Gay Voices
Matthew J. Dempsey

2015-01-13-ScreenShot20150113at1.15.59AMsmall.jpgIn this video I break down some of the psychological nuts and bolts of what makes us attracted to the people we want to date. I also mention the unique challenges that gay men and queer people overall face, and how insight into what otherwise has been chalked up to "magic" can help our relationships in the long run.

Gay Men: What Is Your New Year's Contribution?

Josh Hersh | Posted 03.02.2015 | Gay Voices
Josh Hersh

January is often the month when many of us feverishly start to fulfill or come up with what we want to change in our own lives in the coming year. We become a nation of wide-eyed idealists, hell-bent on doing more, becoming more and repairing the so-called chinks in our armor.

Spike in Tiny Number of Gay Men on PrEP Abandoning Condoms Hardly Represents 'All' Gay Men

John-Manuel Andriote | Posted 02.11.2015 | Gay Voices
John-Manuel Andriote

A Dec. 8 blog post in the San Francisco Business Times has sparked another furor over gay men using the HIV drug Truvada to prevent infection with the deadly virus. "San Francisco men shed condoms in favor of Gilead's HIV prevention pill," alleges the title of SFBT reporter Ron Leuty's opinion piece.