We can't force someone to forgive. Therefore, the road to forgiveness may also involve understanding the person who has harmed us. This requires starting off on a journey that may entail a close examination of the person we need to forgive. The journey can be long and torturous.
In the end, it's not about denial or even weighing the risks against the consequences. It's about confronting these things head on when they happen and hopefully finding a way to get past the hurt, the anger, the denial.
Jeri was traveling light because she understood that carrying grudges from the past was non-productive, even self-destructive. It is, as the saying goes, like swallowing poison and expecting it to kill someone else.