In my adopted hometown of Washington, DC, we are blessed with three major airports, in addition to lots of prominent figures and entertaining scandals from which to derive fodder for alternate airport names.
My seatmate talks about cleaning up his life. The aunt who raised him wants him to move back to South Carolina to live with her, but he doesn't want to. "My cousins sell dope," he says. "I don't want to get mixed up in that again.