Very little is written about how to avoid having relationship regrets. In my interviews with 700 older people -- who had vast experience both in and out of relationships -- I was keenly interested in what younger people can do to avoid regretting their actions when it comes to love.
You can read a thousand books about love and talk to a hundred therapists about what makes a marriage work. But the truth is, nobody knows better than people who have loved each other over seven decades.
In our interviews with hundreds of long-married couples about what works and what doesn't for a long and satisfying relationship... it turns out that our elders believe there's something close to a 'magic bullet' when it comes to deciding in a relationship: 'Should I stay or should I go?'
These "experts" on marriage agreed that one thing all couples need to do -- if you want to remain married as long as they have -- is to learn to communicate about conflicts. More specifically, we all need to learn how to fight.
You can't spend your time calculating "50 percent in, 50 percent back." The attitude has to be one of giving freely. And according to the elders, if you start keeping score you're already in deep trouble.
Marriage is tough, sister. Some of this you know, like nixing the idea that towels will be folded a certain way, tolerating game night with the boys, or if you're a guy, maybe you've heard there will be love stories on your plasma TV.