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Why Does Divorce Create Such Turmoil?

Susan Anderson | Posted 10.12.2015 | Divorce
Susan Anderson

Primal fear is what makes going through divorce, separation, bereavement, loss of a job, loss of a dream so difficult. It triggers abandonment -- our first fear -- a fear universal to all human beings. It is a feeling of being left on the doorstep, of feeling left behind.

Finding Hope in the End

Lauren DePino | Posted 09.30.2015 | Women
Lauren DePino

The burning in me, in my chest and in my gut, the heat that makes me have to write, was keeping me alive. Words were my breath. They were coming from where the pain is, the same place from where the love comes.

Overcoming Love's Invisible Barriers: 12 Helpful Preparations

Susan Anderson | Posted 09.28.2015 | Healthy Living
Susan Anderson

Has it ever occurred to you that love may be staring you in the face, but you just can't recognize it? Maybe the person is too easily taken for grant...

Insecure and Not Sure Your Partner Is Fully Committed? Here Are 12 Tips

Susan Anderson | Posted 09.16.2015 | Healthy Living
Susan Anderson

Weather the storm by using it as grist for developing some emotional self-reliance. By increasing your own stability and constancy, you gain strength and help to advance the relationship. When your partner starts treating you ambivalently, here are a few tips for handling it:

Are You Alone, Stuck in a Pattern, and Can't Get Out? 12 Ways Out

Susan Anderson | Posted 08.21.2015 | Healthy Living
Susan Anderson

Are you and anyone you know caught up in cycles of abandonment? Why do people keep repeating the same patterns over and over? What can they do to bre...

'The 36 Questions' for Falling in Love: What Makes Them Work?

Susan Anderson | Posted 06.10.2015 | Healthy Living
Susan Anderson

The world is full of love-worthy, eligible people looking for a way out of involuntary singleness. They want to put an end to their cycles of abandonm...

How to Survive a Breakup: 12 Ways to Stop Blaming Yourself and Gain From It

Susan Anderson | Posted 05.20.2015 | Women
Susan Anderson

When we experience unrequited love -- a lack of emotional reciprocity from the other person - it is natural to feel insecure and needy. It can cause us to aim our emotional suction cups toward our partner which only succeeds at creating greater distance. Here are 12 things you can do...

Attracted to the Unavailable: 12 ways to Overcome This Self-Sabotaging Pattern

Susan Anderson | Posted 05.14.2015 | Women
Susan Anderson

Why are we attracted to the emotionally unavailable? What can we do about it? Obviously, if we lose interest as soon as someone becomes available, that won't work because we'd be forever chasing and never having a relationship. So how do we get off the hamster wheel?

Unrequited: When the One You Love Doesn't Love You Back

Sara Eckel | Posted 05.20.2015 | Women
Sara Eckel

The idea was to become a woman who this particular man would love, and at that I failed completely. But in the process, I achieved something more important: I started to become the woman I wanted to be.

Why Some Kisses Are So Much Better Than Others

Arlene Nisson Lassin | Posted 12.30.2014 | Fifty
Arlene Nisson Lassin

After I was divorced and middle-aged and back in the dating pool, I unfortunately had to kiss a few more frogs. One I recall was a tongue-darter -- very disconcerting and unromantic. And another one was worse, he had bad breath and tasted like a dried-out steak every time I kissed him. Beef is okay to eat, but NEVER to kiss.

'Sitting Duck' -- The Poem and the Backstory

Tricia McCallum | Posted 12.02.2014 | Healthy Living
Tricia McCallum

(This story appeared in a different version on Tricia's blog. The poem "Sitting Duck" appears in her new book of poetry, The Music of Leaving.) ...

Got Rejected? How You Respond Can Damage Your Emotional Health

Guy Winch, Ph.D. | Posted 07.07.2014 | Healthy Living
Guy Winch, Ph.D.

The bottom line is that rejections are a fact of life -- we all experience them and we all hurt when we do. The best thing we can do is to soothe our emotional pain, take steps to revive our self-esteem, and to connect to our core groups and by doing so remind ourselves that others value and love us even if our date does not.

If This Isn't Real Love, What Is? The Fallibility of Infatuation

Sheri Meyers | Posted 01.23.2014 | Women
Sheri Meyers

Real love is very different than infatuation, because real love grows out of the healing of our childhood wounds through the ups and downs of a relationship. Here are some other ways to tell whether what you're feeling is real love or just infatuation.

9 Emotional Blows After The Initial Divorce Announcement

Micki McWade | Posted 01.23.2014 | Divorce
Micki McWade

From my experience working with people going through or recovering from divorce, I have observed a vast emotional difference between the spouse who leaves the marriage to be with someone else, or for the hope of being with someone else, and the one who has been left.

Are You Just Fighting or Engaging in 'Conscious Combat'?

Linda Bloom LCSW and Charlie Bloom MSW | Posted 08.05.2013 | Healthy Living
Linda Bloom LCSW and Charlie Bloom MSW

It's not just the exposure of our partner's imperfections that we need all that patience to accept and live with, it's the exposure of our own imperfect aspects that get illuminated in reaction to them that leave us shame-faced and embarrassed.

10 Signs You're In Love

Margaret Paul, Ph.D. | Posted 06.14.2013 | Healthy Living
Margaret Paul, Ph.D.

"How do I know when I'm really in love?" "What does it mean to be in love?" "I think I'm in love, but then I have doubts." Such a big question! And we all wish there was an easy answer -- a formula we could follow to determine if we are in love.

What 'I Love You But I'm Not IN Love With You' Really Means

Linda Bloom LCSW and Charlie Bloom MSW | Posted 06.02.2013 | Women
Linda Bloom LCSW and Charlie Bloom MSW

Not every relationship is meant to last forever, and more often than not, each partner may feel differently in regard to whether or not it's time to call it quits. But how do you know when it's really over?

Why Real Love Is Like A Bowl Of Oatmeal

Sheryl Paul | Posted 03.29.2013 | Weddings
Sheryl Paul

Good love is like a bowl of oatmeal.

Relationship Advice: How To Embrace Feelings Of Desire

Tara Brach | Posted 01.23.2014 | Healthy Living
Tara Brach

The same life energy that leads to suffering also provides the fuel for profound awakening. Desire becomes a problem only when it takes over our sense of who we are.

I Never Got Why My Friends Ditched Me For Love... Until I Did It, Too

Erin Joy Henry | Posted 10.30.2012 | Women
Erin Joy Henry

Your friend's 993rd date finally clicks and you're left stripped of your best wing woman. All of a sudden, text messages from your friend take a day to get a response. What gives?

Is It Real Love Or Just Infatuation? 7 Things You Should Consider

Sheryl Paul | Posted 05.21.2012 | Weddings
Sheryl Paul

Romantic Love is, most simply put, infatuation. It's based on the model of longing for someone that you can never completely have, and it's this longing that then becomes mistaken for real love.

The Need to Obsess

Kirsten Chilstrom | Posted 04.02.2012 | Style
Kirsten Chilstrom

Every so often, I discover something new which excites me, which triggers an oft-unexpected burst of physiological euphoria, and I choose to get drunk on it.

Before You Say "I Do:" A Checklist for Smart Women, Pt 2

Dr. Ali Binazir | Posted 08.31.2011 | Women
Dr. Ali Binazir

In the last installment of this article, we covered the first three items on the checklist. To recap, they were: 1) Do not say yes if you're deeply ...

Before You Say "I Do": A Checklist for Smart Women, Pt 1

Dr. Ali Binazir | Posted 08.14.2011 | Women
Dr. Ali Binazir

You fall in love, put your frontal lobe in a jar and marry a guy you later on find you don't know all that well. Why? Because the most reliable aspect of falling in love is that you will fall out of it. On average after 18 months, according to scientists.