Many of our teens have little idea that their parents have feelings that can be hurt and hearts that can be broken. I say this cautiously, but let's hear it for teaching our kids just a little bit of guilt and a whole lot of empathy.
Like much else in life, I tolerate and justify my own bad behavior but gripe about it when I witness others engaged in that same annoying habit. Maybe my disproportionate reaction is Freudian. It's as if I'm trying to purge the behavior from my own repertoire.
The amazing thing about love and attention and encouragement and grace and success and joy is that these things are infinite. We get a new supply every single morning and so we can give it away all day.
We're in a culture that prioritizes self-actualization, but when we see someone who's achieved, or partly achieved, what they want, our first instinct is to tear them down -- and we tear them down because we envy them.
Another year means only one thing to me -- I have to somehow get used to typing a 5 instead of a 4 when I write the year down. That's basically all of it in a nutshell. The real hurdle to bolt over is in remembering that the beginning of the year starts with a 20, and not a 19.
There's a line you don't want to cross, and there are ways to deal with jealousy when it arises. Jealousy can eat away at you and keep you from making progress in life. Here are three ways to deal with jealousy.
It's easy to cut each other down, to make comparisons, and to criticize. It's what we've been taught to do. But think for a minute about what our lives would look and feel like if instead, we were supportive of other women, if we celebrated instead of lamented.
Envy is one of the toughest emotions to deal with because it packs a two-fold punch. First, there is the envy itself, that terrible feeling of loneliness and deprivation you get when your friend's guy impulsively kisses her hair or laces his fingers through hers.
Maybe it's only jealousy. Maybe it's not. We don't understand it, but you know it's not just you. Your friends hate her guts too, and it baffles them as well. All we know is that we want to become something we hate.
After years of being soul-crushingly single, you've finally met a guy who's hot, funny, and close with his family. You might even love him. Everything about him is perfect... for your best friend, Stephanie.
How can we all be more aware of and transform the kind of abundance we are creating each day? The answer: Love yourself, be open to the power of possibility, live and let live, be supportive but not enabling, and make a concerted effort to be the change you wish to see.
I am aware of what makes you brighten up and have those pleasurable magic moments. I am also painfully aware of those little moments that drive women of all ages just a little bit crazy and makes you want to rip your hair out.
There will always be people who disagree with you or who dislike your ideas and actions -- whether or not these people are coming from a positive or a negative place. Appreciate and accept them for being different than you and forgive them if they upset you.
Being satisfied with what you have now does not make you complacent and "stuck" with what you have in your current life. Let that little spark of envy work for you not against you. Let it energize, not exhaust you. Look around and make needed or wanted changes to your life.
At a time in our world's history when our survival and well being are threatened by severe climate change, addiction, stress and unhappiness, we cannot waste another moment envying those who have something to offer us or withholding support from those whose gifts could benefit our world.
I don't want her blue eyes the way her husband must want them before they closed each night. I don't want her body, and not just because it's gone. It was never mine to covet in the first place, just like her life.