Your peers need to view your leadership with the right combination of humility and confidence. This is no easy task. Back to that sandbox. Ask yourself if you protect and covet your turf or if you understand that your efforts and contribution are interdependent on your peers.
Had it not been for a move across the globe, I may not have made the changes that saved me from being consumed by my job and unhealthy lifestyle. Many of us need a slap upside the head in order to change. Otherwise we'd keep pushing forward in a steady state of burnout.
I don't believe in leadership styles. We certainly hear plenty from all sorts of business gurus that this style or that is ideal. I would argue, however, that talking about styles has little value because we are incapable of leading in a way that is inconsistent with who we are as people.
In today's business environment, where innovation, motivation and productivity are more needed than ever, this style of leadership is rapidly losing favor. Not for any "soft" reasons, but because it simply isn't effective at driving business growth.