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Loss of a Spouse

One Year After My Husband Died, How I Chose To Mark The Date

Laurie Burrows Grad | Posted 08.16.2016 | Fifty
Laurie Burrows Grad

On Monday, Aug. 1, one year to the day after Peter died, I fortified my psyche with specific plans, so that I wouldn't be surprised by my volatile emotions. But, what I didn't expect, was that a few days before, I plummeted from a high perch of salutary tranquility into an abyss of sorrow.

The Unspoken Side Of Caregiving

Eric J. Hall | Posted 08.05.2016 | Healthy Living
Eric J. Hall

With the growing number of Americans reaching the age where illness becomes more prevalent, much attention has been focused lately on the important ro...

Why My Journey Of Grief Is So Like A Butterfly's Metamorphosis

Laurie Burrows Grad | Posted 08.04.2016 | Fifty
Laurie Burrows Grad

The other day I was staring out the window and saw the most beautiful butterfly flapping its wings and circling the flowers. While watching it flutter, I instantly felt a shared camaraderie with this majestic creature. My journey of grief parallels the butterfly's metamorphosis on so many levels.

The Perfect Movies For Anyone Who Needs Cheering Up

Laurie Burrows Grad | Posted 07.23.2016 | Fifty
Laurie Burrows Grad

A few weeks ago, I was vacationing with my son Nick, daughter-in-law Carolyn, the grandkids, Lucas aged 13 and Georgia aged 9, and their adorable dog Simon, in Santa Barbara. I thoroughly relished my time being with my sweet family but, it had been a particularly tough day for me emotionally.

The Plus Side Of Flying Through Life Solo

Laurie Burrows Grad | Posted 06.22.2016 | Fifty
Laurie Burrows Grad

My blogs reflect the pain of my journey through grief since the death of my husband last August. I cry, I meditate, but I also try to be positive. I decided to write a blog about the plus side of being solo. It won't take the pain away but it is a positive step on the road to healing.

The Things You Shouldn't Say To Someone Who's Grieving

Laurie Burrows Grad | Posted 05.11.2016 | Fifty
Laurie Burrows Grad

When my husband Peter died last August, I suffered the greatest ordeal imaginable. I had a deep and intense loss, but I definitely didn't 'lose' him. I, myself, am guilty of using the term 'lose' on multiple occasions. But it's not the case.

Life After Death: Moving Forward

Melissa Gould | Posted 05.05.2016 | Women
Melissa Gould

One weekend last October, Antonio and I were staying at a beautiful Bed & Breakfast in the central coast of California. We met another young widow there. She owned the B&B and was inspired, she told us, by the book "Under the Tuscan Sun." Her life changed upon reading it.

What I Have Discovered About Grief

Lisa Gastaldo | Posted 05.03.2016 | Healthy Living
Lisa Gastaldo

"Time heals all wounds" is hollow consolation to someone who has endured the lacerations of loss. I often hear, "You won't get over it, but you will get through it" -- frequently from my own lips.

Arriving At The 'Getting Used To' Phase 9 Months After My Spouse's Death

Laurie Burrows Grad | Posted 05.02.2016 | Fifty
Laurie Burrows Grad

The blow of widowhood is so stunning that it floors the best of us, and surprises even the most prepared. How can one be prepared for the loss of a love? Grief is so shocking that all you can do when it hits is function minute to minute.

The Vultures That Swarmed After The Death Of My Husband

Laurie Burrows Grad | Posted 04.15.2016 | Fifty
Laurie Burrows Grad

Just after my husband Peter died, my accountant warned me about being scammed. I thought I was pretty smart about this and assured him, and the estate attorney, I would not be conned into signing anything without checking with an advisor. But then, things began to happen.

Only the Lonely

Carrie Doubts | Posted 04.06.2016 | Healthy Living
Carrie Doubts

Loneliness is a universal human experience. We are all lonely from time to time, sometimes even when we are with people we know and care about. Loneliness is an opportunity to surrender into the "yearning for union with the lost self."

Where Are You Siri? 'Wherever You Are That's Where I Am'

Laurie Burrows Grad | Posted 03.31.2016 | Fifty
Laurie Burrows Grad

I find myself getting drawn in by Siri's inviting nature, almost viewing Siri as a humanized conversational partner. My Siri is a lovely British woman who talks in dulcet tones. I tried an Australian man but I really like to have a woman around to hear my questions.

The Joke's Over, You Can Come Out Now

Laurie Burrows Grad | Posted 03.21.2016 | Fifty
Laurie Burrows Grad

At least once a day I look for Peter. I look when I put my key in the lock and open the front door. I look when I have gotten into bed and wait for him to slip under the covers beside me. I look when I go downstairs to his office. His presence is in the house.

The Perfect Chicken Soup Recipe For When You Have A Cold

Laurie Burrows Grad | Posted 03.11.2016 | Fifty
Laurie Burrows Grad

I hate getting a cold. It only happens a few times a year but when I do, it goes right to my nose and I can't smell or taste. As a foodie, my sense of smell and taste are my greatest pleasures. When I can't taste, I don't eat, and that is not a good thing for me.

Unmerry Widow: I'm Not Depressed, I'm Sad

Laurie Burrows Grad | Posted 03.02.2016 | Fifty
Laurie Burrows Grad

After Peter died I read book after book about grief. It appears that there is blueprint, rigidly entrenched in our society, prescribing the stages of grief. Society has labeled a gold standard for behavior after a loss.

Finding My Self-Identity Again After The Death Of My Husband

Laurie Burrows Grad | Posted 02.23.2016 | Fifty
Laurie Burrows Grad

When I was a teenager I would look forward to the coming school year with new books, pencils, erasers, and the whole schmear. I would go to class, write in my new books, but when I had one mistake, it was over. I was the best little girl in the world and had to be perfect. I couldn't just toss it off. I had to start again.

Learning To Cook For One After The Death Of My Husband

Laurie Burrows Grad | Posted 02.15.2016 | Fifty
Laurie Burrows Grad

In the six months since my husband Peter died, I have been eating out much of the time. But now things are quieting down and I seem to have more time at home in the evenings and my dinners are downright pathetic.

3 Myths Of Grief To Stop Believing

Carrie Doubts | Posted 02.03.2016 | Healthy Living
Carrie Doubts

You may feel that people around you would rather that you "get over it" quickly and "get on with your life" so they can get on with theirs too. Most of us aren't taught how to grieve, and so, we won't know how to be with others in a supportive way when they are grieving. Some myths about how one "should" grieve:

Finding A Modicum Of Normalcy 5 Months After Losing My Spouse

Laurie Burrows Grad | Posted 01.24.2016 | Fifty
Laurie Burrows Grad

It is over five months since my sweet husband Peter died and I am beginning to find a modicum of normalcy. My dinner dates have slowed down but my lunch plans are still going. Yes, I am 'demoted to lunch' a bit, although I don't blame my friends, it is more on my part.

How This Widow Addressed The Practical Part Of Crying All The Time

Laurie Burrows Grad | Posted 12.18.2015 | Fifty
Laurie Burrows Grad

I admit to openly crying at movies and have even been known to cry at a commercial that includes a puppy. But I had no idea that I had so many tears in my body. I have cried so much since my sweet Peter died that I altered my vision and even improved my astigmatism!

Suddenly Single: 7 Inspiring Stories of Women Thriving After a Loss

Jacqueline Miller | Posted 11.18.2015 | Women
Jacqueline Miller

On Super Bowl Sunday 2002, my husband didn't wake up. He died of a heart attack in his sleep. I was devastated. I became a suddenly single mom, left to raise my six-year-old and eleven-year-old sons, while managing a demanding career.

It's Been 3 Months Since My Spouse's Death And I'm Still Not Doing Well

Laurie Burrows Grad | Posted 12.17.2015 | Fifty
Laurie Burrows Grad

After months people chirp at me that I am 'out and about and doing so well.' In their minds it seems to be a positive. In truth, I might smile, but inside, I am woefully unhappy. I am doing 'well' on the outside but on the inside, I feel the pain even more because the shock has worn off and the reality has hit.

Who Will Zip Up My Dress Now That I'm A Widow?

Laurie Burrows Grad | Posted 10.24.2015 | Fifty
Laurie Burrows Grad

Grief has changed my life forever. I am not the person I was three months ago. What existed in my life before my husband Peter died has been suddenly altered. Nothing is the same, nor will it ever be so. What was important to me before is meaningless now.

A Letter To My Dearly Departed Husband Peter

Laurie Burrows Grad | Posted 10.11.2015 | Fifty
Laurie Burrows Grad

My grief therapist says I should write to you. So I am writing a letter to you like a kid writes to Santa. The letter will never reach its recipient, but the writing is therapeutic. Maybe you will send me a message from the North Pole or wherever you are that you are OK?

I Lost My Spouse A Month Ago And The Pain Is Unimaginable

Laurie Burrows Grad | Posted 09.22.2015 | Fifty
Laurie Burrows Grad

One month ago, Peter, my husband of 47 years, died of a heart attack. When you lose a parent, you have siblings or family members to comfort you. When you lose a spouse, you lose your life partner and are alone. The hardest thing about grief is to see life going on.