Friends worried that I was turning into a sex addict but I knew it was a phase. After an unhappy marriage, I wanted to distance myself from my own emotions and immerse myself in the world of erotic pleasure. If you're going to be a total hedonist, there's no better time to go for it then in your 40s.
I share stories of women using a mindful approach to find their natural sexual vitality. Desire is a hot-house flower; it's complicated and high maintenance. It's not amenable to pat solutions because desire is greater than the lust of our biology; it's an endeavor of the spirit, of our innermost voice longing to shine.
I know that my self-esteem decline interferes with me and my husband's intimacy. I know I don't feel attractive and that's why I'm not attracted. So I will continue to pray that I rediscover myself, that I rediscover my femininity, and that I gain the motivation to make myself feel and look beautiful again.