Whether you're from Mars or Venus shouldn't matter here. The secret is the same for all of us. Relationships aren't "work". I hate that phrase. If you're working too hard on your relationship, you may be with the wrong person. The real phrasing is that real love means growing and evolving and being open to that transformation together as a couple.
In my mind, I have focused on four or five things that I know are deal breakers for me. I have come to think of these things as allergens. Just as someone may be allergic to pollen or fur, I am hypersensitive to certain allergens. My body will experience an adverse reaction if I am exposed to these annoying and dangerous allergens.
Can't I just wear a nice white pantsuit that covers a multitude of sins? I asked myself. Yet something about those white dresses called to me. I told myself it was for my fiancé, but if I had been honest, he could have cared less about the dress. He only cared about what was under the dress, so I should have stopped staring at the cupcake store next to the Bridal Shop.
I act on impulse a lot. This is one of the main reasons I adore my husband. He stands by me through all of my whims, and supports each decision... bad or good. There are times he is smiling and probably doubting my decision, but he would never let me know. We are each other's cheerleaders. So, the boudoir shoot was a whim I didn't think through. It sounded like a great idea, I found a spectacular photographer, arranged a date, and then I looked in the mirror.