As of November 2014, we've been together 13 years and married 12 years. My grandparents were married 55 years and my parents were married a few months shy of 35 years. I'm hoping to follow in their footsteps in that way too. So far so good.
This week I celebrated my wedding anniversary. My 'other' wedding anniversary for the year, is what I call it. You see, I married the same person twice; one was a civil ceremony, while the other, a church (Catholic) ceremony. And neither one was perfect.
Ever wonder why it's completely normal for Indian guys to live at home with their parents well into their 20s and 30s? Or how even after marriage, they live with their parents and spouse as a "joint family?"
In today's day and age, it is very common for single people to linger too long in the wrong relationship. Of course, this is understandable, as often times, the unknown seems very scary and a current relationship is usually quite comfortable.
Relationships are always a mix; they're woven from golden shining moments and niggling annoyances, big whack-you-over-the-head disasters and then, just when you were about to give up, a deep sense of tenderness, connection and certainty reminds you of why you fell in love in the first place.
Most couples deal with a roller coaster of financial issues, the craziness of raising families, and when and how to sneak in a little nooky time on a daily basis. Something has to keep Jerry Springer busy, right? Wrong. What actually brings out love's boxing gloves might surprise you.
There's the kicker -- assuming he's not a jobless, worthless mass of cells with a penis, then guess what? It's you that has the problem. Here's where you went wrong.
So many positive things are born from love, they are too numerous to list. It is essential to our lives to feel loved and to give love. There is nothing positive that comes from hate. It takes time; it takes effort. In a divorce, it costs money.
Perhaps your life has become someone else's idea of what you should be doing. Perhaps that you that sparked and shimmered in your dreams has winked small. Perhaps it is time to journey through your years and revisit and reclaim the child, the teen, the young adult.
The feeling of entitlement often works as a detonator to the bomb that destroys our relationships. The spirit of entitlement smothers love, but the spirit of gratitude lets love soar. It's the difference between taking and receiving.
Divorce gets a bad rap. It's frequently billed as the ultimate example of failure in life -- personal, romantic and familial. And a lot of those who've been through it refer to it with a tough swallow, advising you to never even think of going there. But I'm here to defend it.
As someone who would never stay married to a man who committed a heinous crime or marry a man who was incarcerated, it's hard for me to relate to the choices these women have made. They seem to love their husbands, but for the most part, they're not living in the real world.
The Fear. The sheer terror. The knowledge that we're going to have to formulate an opinion on clothes that we're totally indifferent to.
I am not going to say that watching a man vacuum is traditionally sexy, but here's what's less sexy: me doing it all the time. Helping with housework frees your wife up to get relaxed and in a sexy mood.
When I got married, I was still very much a child. I had no idea what it meant to live with my significant other, day in, day out, and make it work. I had yet to learn that getting married and being married were two very different things.
Sometimes, you've just got to jump in, commit to getting naked with your partner and just have sex.