To understand the pleasure our bodies give to men, rather than just being a tool for that pleasure, a woman needs to experience the sublime herself, with herself. We were born with the capacity for it.
What's desperate about loving yourself and honoring your own needs? If you're hungry, you eat. If you're thirsty, you drink. If you're horny, you do something sexual. It's not rocket science. Where's the issue here? No government or church will ever control my orgasms, I know that.
Aside from the obvious upsides of masturbation that we know and love, here are some of my favorite positive side effects of a routine, healthy dose of self-love.
TV shows like Girls and Broad City have made vibrators mainstream, but the sex toys still aren't exactly easy to choose, especially if you're a first-time vibe-buyer.
From an evolutionary point of view, however, sexual attraction to pain would seem to be maladaptive. Pain is, by definition, aversive. It evolved as a signal to get our attention and keep us out of trouble.
Look. No one wants to hear what they can or cannot do with their body. We came by free will in the hardest way and we feel like we've earned it. "This is my life!" But, the whole free will thing isn't without its catches.
Your partner is feeling frisky, but you aren't. Or you really want to do it, but you're too tired or too stressed or too something else. Turn that downtown frown around with any of these MiddleSexy recommendations for getting yourself in the mood.
Making yogurt from your vagina is a party trick, and the pussy is not a toy. The pussy is a wonder. It can produce incredible orgasms with remarkable health benefits. It can bring a baby from the womb to the world. It brings pleasure and life, not breakfast.
Nobody warns you. It just happens. At least that's my story. I was in my late 40s, passionately in love, and suddenly the wondrous release that always made me so giddy just wasn't there anymore.
While some people feel that porn enhances their sex lives and relationships, continually more are suffering from the downsides. If porn only brings you benefits, fantastic! Watch on. If not, or if you're unsure, here are some ways you can keep it from interfering with your health and happiness.
Strangely, though we talk about most everything, we never talk about the lack of sex. We both know how much time has gone by. It's just kind of understood that, oh yeah, we need to get on this. And on each other.
The key to an erotic endeavor post-pregnancy is taking your time. Some mothers may feel traumatized by the experience of having been, quite literally, split wide open. The prospect of allowing anything -- small or large -- to enter the vaginal area can seem more than daunting.
"Jenny! I was supposed to meet you at the door naked!" the gorgeous woman standing before me said before flinging her arms around me. She was almost naked, wearing a thin, white tank that barely covered her behind.
Every time we give another woman permission to talk about her experience openly, we reclaim a little power from a society that tells us we should just grin and juice cleanse it.
As I started receiving attendant care and being made to wear pee bags (for my own freedom, they claimed -- really?), I noticed that my ability and desire to freely "whip it out," as it were, had waned with my loss of privacy. Now there were all these barriers to self-love.