Regardless of the differences in their respective comfort levels, all couples have an (unspoken) agreed upon level of comfort hat they negotiate on an on-going basis, each partner offering balance in the security/risk continuum, or to use another metaphor the roots and wings.
Despite what I am about to detail, I am decidedly not above the proverbial wedding fantasy. Like every American female I've ever known, met, read, or heard of, my whole being has been white-washed in wedding-dom.
While many in the world may not realize this, civilization is on verge of the greatest change it has ever known. Entire social systems and institutions may soon become obsolete, nonfunctional, and even unsafe. New marriages will not likely outlive this century.