Because the way we talk is deeply enmeshed with how we think, feel and act in the world, our critiques of how others speak are frequently a smoke-screen for our critiques about other aspects of their lives.
As the parent of two terrifying little boys, I am afraid that I cannot fully ease the fears of prospective parents. Thus, in honor of Halloween, I have decided to put together a list of the most terrifying things you have to look forward to on your journey to parenthood.
I remember trying to get the real scoop on parenting, good and bad, before I had a baby. "It's hard," new parents would say, and then quickly paper over that tiny admission. "But of course I wouldn't trade it for anything!" It sounded suspicious to me. But once I had a baby, I followed suit.
I knew that just one month ago, before we had Aspen, I could've easily handled this situation, but now, trying to hold a crying baby, while caring for a puking kid and an emotionally distraught little girl, felt like too much.
Work is often a prerequisite for great beauty. Every laugh involves a heave of the chest. Every deep, fulfilling breath moves the diaphragm. Every smile requires the movement of muscles and every glance above requires your neck to fold behind you. Every beautiful thing requires work.
I had faith he would do his best to adapt to the steep learning curve of parenthood, but it wasn't until I actually saw my husband in action (starting in the delivery room) that I knew I was going to love him more now that we had a baby.
You may pretend you are fine, functioning, because you are still able to sauté the garlic a perfect golden brown and vacuum the dog hair off of the Chinese rug and put on mascara and cut the baby's tiny fingernails without drawing blood. And yet, you are totally detached.
A growing body of evidence shows that ensuring new parents and all workers have access to family friendly policies like paid sick days and paid family and medical leave has widespread benefits for the health and economic security of families and the strength of businesses and the economy.
In the delivery room, I was dressed in my scrubs just like in the movies. My seat was next to my love, who was on the operating table, arms stretched out. There was a screen cloth right above her sternum obscuring her nether region. Her face was glowing in the halo of the operating lights.