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Newly Separated

10 Ways To Help Someone Going Through A Divorce

Jackie Pilossoph | Posted 07.28.2015 | Divorce
Jackie Pilossoph

Perhaps almost as bad a going through a divorce yourself is watching someone you love go through one. Whether it's a parent, a son, a daughter, or a close relative or friend, seeing someone in that kind of pain can cause you anxiety and make you feel helpless and frustrated.

9 Reasons An Amicable Divorce Could Turn Ugly in a Heartbeat

Jackie Pilossoph | Posted 07.21.2015 | Divorce
Jackie Pilossoph

Enjoy something out of every day. Because an ugly divorce means lots of unpredictability and bombs dropped. It feels uneasy and creepy and scary.

A Key Word in Ending Up Happy After Divorce

Jackie Pilossoph | Posted 07.14.2015 | Divorce
Jackie Pilossoph

There are countless reasons why people get divorced, but they all the reasons come down to one commonality: one or both people in the marriage decided they would be happier alone rather than staying married.

Second Thoughts: Completely Expected In Divorce

Jackie Pilossoph | Posted 07.07.2015 | Divorce
Jackie Pilossoph

When I got a question from a reader asking, Is it normal to have second thoughts about divorce? I smiled sadly, and answered to myself, "I don't think it's normal NOT to have second thoughts about divorce."

How To Talk To A Woman: 12 Tips

Jackie Pilossoph | Posted 06.30.2015 | Divorce
Jackie Pilossoph

When a newly divorced reader emailed me, asking "How do I talk to a woman?" I felt like as a divorced woman, I might be able to help.

Why Is This Guy's Ex Obsessed With His Love Life

Jackie Pilossoph | Posted 06.10.2015 | Divorce
Jackie Pilossoph

Unless she did something unthinkably horrible to you, you might want to consider being friendly with her. It might work if you set boundaries and focus on the fact that the two of you were once significant to each other, which justifies some type of positive relationship, in my opinion.

11 Ways to Jumpstart the Recovery of Your Divorce

Jackie Pilossoph | Posted 05.12.2015 | Divorce
Jackie Pilossoph

When a spouse leaves, it can seem almost impossible to imagine being happy again someday. In one woman's case, her husband has taken her youth and your innocence, and she really doesn't know what life is like without him. It's very traumatizing and will have an affect on her forever.

A Word You Should Take Out of Your Vocabulary During Divorce

Jackie Pilossoph | Posted 06.26.2015 | Divorce
Jackie Pilossoph

There is a word I hear a lot from men and women getting divorced. Actually, they refer to themselves as this word, and I have to say, it really really really bugs me. The word? LOSER.

What To Do If Your Ex Is Airing Dirty Laundry

Jackie Pilossoph | Posted 06.22.2015 | Divorce
Jackie Pilossoph

Sometimes, the conversation can go to far and people decide to reveal very personal things about their soon-to-be ex. In other words, if you are getting divorced, be prepared that your dirty laundry might be aired.

Is Sex With Lots of People Normal for the Newly Separated?

Jackie Pilossoph | Posted 05.19.2015 | Divorce
Jackie Pilossoph

Some men and women after divorce go crazy when it comes to sex, seeking out multiple physical encounters. If that is the case, my opinion is that they are trying to cover up a deep wound with a temporary Band-Aid, and it never works.

Surviving the Raw Emotions of a Fresh Breakup

Jackie Pilossoph | Posted 05.07.2015 | Divorce
Jackie Pilossoph

Let yourself feel all of these feelings. Live day to day, trying to grab every ounce of enjoyment out of every day that you can. For me, that means anything having to do with my children and my family, and of course, enjoying the passion I have for my work. This is the way I've been living my life since my divorce, and it works.

What I'm Too Ashamed And Devastated To Admit About My Split Out Loud

Samantha Darby Sollenberger | Posted 04.25.2015 | Divorce
Samantha Darby Sollenberger

This is harder because I don't know what my husband has chosen over me. Over Alice. Over our family.

Why You Need to Stop Hating Your Ex

Jackie Pilossoph | Posted 04.14.2015 | Divorce
Jackie Pilossoph

I can honestly say that from what I've seen, men and women going through a divorce experience hatred that runs so deep, it's frightening. I would imagine the reason for the hate is because they care so much. Think about it. People who don't care don't show or feel any emotion. They just shrug.

Why It's Important to Read Every Word of Every Divorce Document You Sign

Jackie Pilossoph | Posted 04.05.2015 | Divorce
Jackie Pilossoph

There is nothing more empowering than knowledge. Remember that, and take the time to thoroughly understand what the pen in your hand is about to help you sign.

How to Handle Your Ex's Unsolicited Attack

Jackie Pilossoph | Posted 03.30.2015 | Divorce
Jackie Pilossoph

A person's first instinct in receiving a text or email that I call "an unsolicited attack" is to attack back. Send back a response. Defend yourself. Hurt back. But my divorce advice is do not reply. Do nothing. Do not type one key. Leave it alone.

Your Ex: He's Not as Blissful as You Think

Jackie Pilossoph | Posted 03.23.2015 | Divorce
Jackie Pilossoph

I am of the opinion that any relationship which starts with lies and cheating has a huge chance of failure, long term. Why? Because eventually, the burden of the guilt associated with what you did catches up with you and it damages the relationship.

A Question Every Person Going Through a Divorce Asks

Jackie Pilossoph | Posted 03.15.2015 | Divorce
Jackie Pilossoph

It's a question that every person going through divorce asks: How Do I Get Over this Hurt? They ask their friends, their family, their therapist, even themselves. They also ask me. And here is how I answer.

Newly Separated, No Kids and No Family During the Holidays

Jackie Pilossoph | Posted 02.15.2015 | Divorce
Jackie Pilossoph

I know a newly separated guy who when first married (several years ago) moved to Chicago for his wife, whose entire family is here. He isn't from here.

10 Things to Tell Yourself When Your Ex Shows Divorce Anger

Jackie Pilossoph | Posted 02.02.2015 | Divorce
Jackie Pilossoph

What is particularly bothersome about it is that the children grow up seeing this behavior, so what chance will they ever have of NOT acting the same way -- with the same divorce anger -- in the event that they get divorced, or even just in general?

10 Reasons to Feel Thankful On Thanksgiving Despite Your Nasty Divorce

Jackie Pilossoph | Posted 01.26.2015 | Divorce
Jackie Pilossoph

You are better off now than you were in your destructive marriage. The truly bad part -- the fighting or cheating or abuse or lying -- is behind you. You are on your way to a better life, whereas when you were still together, you were not.

Should I Wish My Ex a Happy Birthday?

Jackie Pilossoph | Posted 01.13.2015 | Divorce
Jackie Pilossoph

Should I wish my ex a happy birthday? is a question I received on my site from a guy who has been separated for about a year. I thought the best way to answer it would be to list all the pros and cons of wishing your ex a happy birthday.

This Group Of Americans Have The Lowest Well-Being, According To A New Survey

The Huffington Post | Rebecca Adams | Posted 08.06.2015 | Divorce

Divorce may seem daunting, but that's not the worst part of the dissolution of a marriage: being separated is, according to a new Gallup poll. Afte...

Sexless Marriage Led to Man's Divorce

Jackie Pilossoph | Posted 12.23.2014 | Divorce
Jackie Pilossoph

I think it is very normal and in a man's nature to want to feel appreciated and important and loved. Yes, loved. They are supposed to be strong and manly, but they want a hug. They want to feel secure too. And, of course, they want to be desired physically.

Living in the Same House While Newly Separated

Jackie Pilossoph | Posted 12.14.2014 | Divorce
Jackie Pilossoph

I hate to say this to people living in the same house while newly separated, but here it is. It is what it is (for right now.) It's really, really hard. I get it. But, the good news is, it isn't forever, and both you and your ex are taking steps to each get to a better place in life.

Sex With Your Ex: Appealing or No Way?!

Jackie Pilossoph | Posted 12.07.2014 | Divorce
Jackie Pilossoph

In certain cases, sex with an ex is sexy and fun and exciting. Temporarily, that is. I have to believe that nine times out of 10 the after effects are disappointment, hurt, sadness and regret. So, be careful.