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Newly Separated

Is Sex With Lots of People Normal for the Newly Separated?

Jackie Pilossoph | Posted 03.19.2015 | Divorce
Jackie Pilossoph

Some men and women after divorce go crazy when it comes to sex, seeking out multiple physical encounters. If that is the case, my opinion is that they are trying to cover up a deep wound with a temporary Band-Aid, and it never works.

Surviving the Raw Emotions of a Fresh Breakup

Jackie Pilossoph | Posted 03.07.2015 | Divorce
Jackie Pilossoph

Let yourself feel all of these feelings. Live day to day, trying to grab every ounce of enjoyment out of every day that you can. For me, that means anything having to do with my children and my family, and of course, enjoying the passion I have for my work. This is the way I've been living my life since my divorce, and it works.

What I'm Too Ashamed And Devastated To Admit About My Split Out Loud

Samantha Darby Sollenberger | Posted 02.23.2015 | Divorce
Samantha Darby Sollenberger

This is harder because I don't know what my husband has chosen over me. Over Alice. Over our family.

Why You Need to Stop Hating Your Ex

Jackie Pilossoph | Posted 04.14.2015 | Divorce
Jackie Pilossoph

I can honestly say that from what I've seen, men and women going through a divorce experience hatred that runs so deep, it's frightening. I would imagine the reason for the hate is because they care so much. Think about it. People who don't care don't show or feel any emotion. They just shrug.

Why It's Important to Read Every Word of Every Divorce Document You Sign

Jackie Pilossoph | Posted 04.05.2015 | Divorce
Jackie Pilossoph

There is nothing more empowering than knowledge. Remember that, and take the time to thoroughly understand what the pen in your hand is about to help you sign.

How to Handle Your Ex's Unsolicited Attack

Jackie Pilossoph | Posted 03.30.2015 | Divorce
Jackie Pilossoph

A person's first instinct in receiving a text or email that I call "an unsolicited attack" is to attack back. Send back a response. Defend yourself. Hurt back. But my divorce advice is do not reply. Do nothing. Do not type one key. Leave it alone.

Your Ex: He's Not as Blissful as You Think

Jackie Pilossoph | Posted 03.23.2015 | Divorce
Jackie Pilossoph

I am of the opinion that any relationship which starts with lies and cheating has a huge chance of failure, long term. Why? Because eventually, the burden of the guilt associated with what you did catches up with you and it damages the relationship.

A Question Every Person Going Through a Divorce Asks

Jackie Pilossoph | Posted 03.15.2015 | Divorce
Jackie Pilossoph

It's a question that every person going through divorce asks: How Do I Get Over this Hurt? They ask their friends, their family, their therapist, even themselves. They also ask me. And here is how I answer.

Newly Separated, No Kids and No Family During the Holidays

Jackie Pilossoph | Posted 02.15.2015 | Divorce
Jackie Pilossoph

I know a newly separated guy who when first married (several years ago) moved to Chicago for his wife, whose entire family is here. He isn't from here.

10 Things to Tell Yourself When Your Ex Shows Divorce Anger

Jackie Pilossoph | Posted 02.02.2015 | Divorce
Jackie Pilossoph

What is particularly bothersome about it is that the children grow up seeing this behavior, so what chance will they ever have of NOT acting the same way -- with the same divorce anger -- in the event that they get divorced, or even just in general?

10 Reasons to Feel Thankful On Thanksgiving Despite Your Nasty Divorce

Jackie Pilossoph | Posted 01.26.2015 | Divorce
Jackie Pilossoph

You are better off now than you were in your destructive marriage. The truly bad part -- the fighting or cheating or abuse or lying -- is behind you. You are on your way to a better life, whereas when you were still together, you were not.

Should I Wish My Ex a Happy Birthday?

Jackie Pilossoph | Posted 01.13.2015 | Divorce
Jackie Pilossoph

Should I wish my ex a happy birthday? is a question I received on my site from a guy who has been separated for about a year. I thought the best way to answer it would be to list all the pros and cons of wishing your ex a happy birthday.

This Group Of Americans Have The Lowest Well-Being, According To A New Survey

The Huffington Post | Rebecca Adams | Posted 11.03.2014 | Divorce

Divorce may seem daunting, but that's not the worst part of the dissolution of a marriage: being separated is, according to a new Gallup poll. Afte...

Sexless Marriage Led to Man's Divorce

Jackie Pilossoph | Posted 12.23.2014 | Divorce
Jackie Pilossoph

I think it is very normal and in a man's nature to want to feel appreciated and important and loved. Yes, loved. They are supposed to be strong and manly, but they want a hug. They want to feel secure too. And, of course, they want to be desired physically.

Living in the Same House While Newly Separated

Jackie Pilossoph | Posted 12.14.2014 | Divorce
Jackie Pilossoph

I hate to say this to people living in the same house while newly separated, but here it is. It is what it is (for right now.) It's really, really hard. I get it. But, the good news is, it isn't forever, and both you and your ex are taking steps to each get to a better place in life.

Sex With Your Ex: Appealing or No Way?!

Jackie Pilossoph | Posted 12.07.2014 | Divorce
Jackie Pilossoph

In certain cases, sex with an ex is sexy and fun and exciting. Temporarily, that is. I have to believe that nine times out of 10 the after effects are disappointment, hurt, sadness and regret. So, be careful.

My Wife Filed for Divorce! Now What?

Jackie Pilossoph | Posted 10.15.2014 | Divorce
Jackie Pilossoph

Typical scenario: You know you're having problems with your spouse. There's lots of arguing, the person seems like a stranger, and everyone's walking on eggshells.

A Really Big Reason Why Marriages Fail

Jackie Pilossoph | Posted 10.07.2014 | Divorce
Jackie Pilossoph

A common cliché is "you have to be happy with yourself before you are going to be happy with someone else." Yes, that is true, but what happens when two people were happy, got married and then some life change caused one of the people to be unhappy?

Coping with Divorce: When Your Kids are With Your Ex and You're Home Alone

Jackie Pilossoph | Posted 07.19.2014 | Divorce
Jackie Pilossoph

If someone asked me what the hardest part of divorce was, I would say it was just after my ex moved out, and the nights my kids were at his house. I would go to bed and wake up in an eerily quiet house and I hated it so much. Coping with divorce in this regard isn't easy and it takes time.

20 Things I Wish I Could Have Told My Newly Separated Self

Jackie Pilossoph | Posted 07.05.2014 | Divorce
Jackie Pilossoph

14. You're going to meet a lot of men who will paint a bleak picture of what the dating scene after divorce is like. Trust me, there are good ones out there! Don't lose hope.

My Ex is Dating My Friend! How to Handle it and How to Keep From Going Insane

Jackie Pilossoph | Posted 06.14.2014 | Divorce
Jackie Pilossoph

2. Their relationship is working because of the "scandalous and forbidden" element.

12 Stupid Things You Should Never Do After A Split

Jackie Pilossoph | Posted 06.06.2014 | Divorce
Jackie Pilossoph

being newly separated feels like you are on trial, like you are being watched and judged. It's scary. You don't know what your ex is going to do, or what moves he/she is going to make because all of a sudden, he or she has become the enemy, a total stranger. It's a horrible feeling.

Why Going Back to Work After Divorce Could be the Best Thing For You

Jackie Pilossoph | Posted 05.31.2014 | Divorce
Jackie Pilossoph

In closing, I will say this. Nothing bad can ever come from going back to work after divorce! Nothing. What you think might be a curse can turn out to be an opportunity for you to grab a life you absolutely love.

Should You Date Someone Who Is Separated But Not Yet Divorced?

Jackie Pilossoph | Posted 05.18.2014 | Divorce
Jackie Pilossoph

4. The person hasn't gone through those feelings you go through when your divorce is final.

What All Divorcés Need To Admit

Jackie Pilossoph | Posted 05.11.2014 | Divorce
Jackie Pilossoph

In so many cases, I see people who are unwilling to take ANY accountability for their divorce. They place the blame entirely on their ex. It's infuriatingly frustrating to me.