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Parent Humor

35 Life Lessons From a Toddler

Jennifer S. White | Posted 11.01.2016 | Parents
Jennifer S. White

Recently my toddler turned 2 years old. Like many parents, I feel I’ve learned more from watching my kids grow up than they’ve learned from me. He...

How to Shop for Your Kids While on a Business Trip

Greg Schwem | Posted 10.04.2016 | Parents
Greg Schwem

Every parent can reduce their child separation guilt by coming home from a business trip loaded with gifts. Comedian and parent blogger Greg Schwem re...

29 Times Parents Were Hilarious And The Internet Loved It

The Huffington Post | Caroline Bologna | Posted 09.09.2016 | Parents

When you’re in the throes of parenting chaos, you can’t take yourself too seriously. Between the messes, sleep deprivation and utter frustration, ...

10 Things Not to Say to a Pregnant Woman

Courtney Ellis | Posted 09.03.2016 | Parents
Courtney Ellis

1. Are you sure you’re not having twins/triplets? This. Is. The. WORST. It’s a not-so-subtle way of saying, “You look enormous.” Why would you...

19 Things I've Heard My Kids Say And It's Not Even 9:00 A.M.

Jennifer S. White | Posted 08.11.2016 | Parents
Jennifer S. White

Here's a random list of things my two children, ages almost six and going on two, have said this morning, and it's not even nine o'clock.

An honest Mothers Day request !

Ger Renton | Posted 04.28.2017 | Parents
Ger Renton

Yep Mother's Day is almost here! Let me be as honest as I can be regarding what us mothers really want on this 'our' day. We don't want to mother. ...

Totally Inappropriate Endings to 5 Truly Terrible Kid Shows

Nicole Johnson | Posted 03.15.2017 | Parents
Nicole Johnson

I am a television junkie. I love television. I love my kids. I do not love television for kids. Sure, some of it's okay. And we actually adored Arthur...

10 Things Second-Time Moms Couldn't Care Less About

Mommy Nearest | Posted 09.25.2016 | Parents
Mommy Nearest

When you're a first-time mother, everything feels huge and important. It's difficult to know what advice to follow or what timelines to pay attention to. Having a new baby is difficult enough without worrying about all the endless obligations and deadlines you (or your baby) are supposed to be meeting.

16 Bizarre Things You've Actually Said As A Parent

The Huffington Post | Hollis Miller | Posted 09.08.2015 | Parents

Before you become a parent, you probably didn't expect to utter odd phrases about butts, what household objects cannot be eaten and what's allowed to ...

Funniest Parenting Tweets: What Moms And Dads Said On Twitter This Week

The Huffington Post | Hollis Miller | Posted 08.28.2015 | Parents

Kids may say the darndest things, but parents tweet about them in the funniest ways. So each week, we round up the most hilarious 140-character quips ...

10 More Images That Make Mommy and Daddy Cringe

Lori Ferraro | Posted 06.16.2015 | Parents
Lori Ferraro

I said it before, being a parent can be completely terrifying.

20 Ways a Minnesota Winter Equals an Arizona Summer

Rebecca Hubanks | Posted 03.17.2015 | Travel
Rebecca Hubanks

Dear reader, it suites to compare that if you find yourself in the Great North braving winter or in Phoenix's sweltering summer, you'll surely relate to these parallels.

The Funniest Tweets From Parents This Week

Posted 01.09.2015 | Parents

Kids may say the darndest things, but parents tweet about them in the funniest ways -- so we like to round up the most hilarious 140-character quips f...

The 50 Steps of Mommy Morning Mayhem

Jodi Meltzer | Posted 01.12.2015 | Parents
Jodi Meltzer

Echoes of temper tantrums reverberate in your head. You sit down slowly (careful to protect yourself from stray LEGOs), look around, and shake your head in disbelief that you survived.

The Funniest Tweets From Parents This Week

Posted 11.10.2014 | Parents

Kids may say the darndest things, but parents tweet about them in the funniest ways -- so we like to round up the most hilarious 140-character quips f...

Can a Teen Die of Embarrassment?

Alexandra Rosas | Posted 01.06.2015 | Parents
Alexandra Rosas

How many teens actually die of embarrassment anyway? And you can't count the time I went to pick up the pizza in my pajama bottoms and his dad's winter boots. When you're 16 years old, the answer is every day, and every time, your mother is near you, living and breathing.

15 Halloween Costumes That Truly Terrify Parents

Jessica McNeill Azar | Posted 12.30.2014 | Parents
Jessica McNeill Azar

If one of these things came to my door, I would probably pee in my pants and hide. I am proud to present to you a collection of these post-childbearing horrors in costume form.

Kids Say The Darndest Things

Sarah Cottrell | Posted 11.18.2014 | Parents
Sarah Cottrell

My son is 4 years old. He likes to tell stories and make weird sounds at the top of his lungs. The other day, he was on a roll, making annoying fart sounds with his armpits and mouth.

14 Signs It's the Last Week of School

Alexandra Rosas | Posted 08.12.2014 | Parents
Alexandra Rosas

This week is the last week of school for most of the country. For us, it's always the second week in June, but even without a calendar, my kids would still know the academic year is wrapping up. Here's how they figure it out.

I'm Guilty Of These 5 Parenting Mistakes (And You Probably Are Too)

Susannah Lewis | Posted 04.06.2014 | Parents
Susannah Lewis

I can only hope that the unconditional love that I possess for my precious offspring will keep them on the right path and make up for my countless mistakes.

9 Ways Living With Kids Is Just Like Living in a Haunted House

Susan McLean | Posted 01.23.2014 | Parents
Susan McLean

You sense it in the bathroom while you're taking a shower, slithering about just outside the curtain. It's next to your bed while you sleep, and you don't need to open your eyes to know that it's only inches from your face, silently staring at you.

10 Types Of Moms On Facebook

Liz Kozak | Posted 12.09.2012 | Parents
Liz Kozak

Hey, Facebook Moms! I heard ya, loud and clear. It seems I left quite a few of us off the list.

10 Questions All Parents Ask Themselves | Posted 09.05.2012 | Parents

The everyday head-scratchers that crop up once you become a parent can be every bit as perplexing as these biggies (and some days, even more so). Ever asked yourself any of these questions?

Self-Help From a 2-Year-Old

Jason Good | Posted 07.24.2012 | Parents
Jason Good

If you're gonna run, do it at top speed, man. Life is too short to walk in the mall.

World's First Children-to-Parent Dictionary

Mark C. Miller | Posted 07.03.2011 | Comedy
Mark C. Miller

Language is one of the few things, aside from the cat and their bowels, over which children can exercise a certain degree of power and control.