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Parenting Gay Kids

When My Son Met His 'Boyfriend,' Darren Criss (PHOTO)

Amelia | Posted 02.02.2016 | Queer Voices
Amelia

What could I say to this young man who meant so much to my kid, this young man who, by playing a television character, had helped lead my son to tell me about his orientation and, by extension, helped change the trajectory of my own life toward activism?

What I'd Say To A Parent With A Gay Child, From Jane Lynch (WATCH)

Posted 08.13.2013 | Home

Jane Lynch gave advice to parents with gay children when she joined me on Mondays With Marlo this week. It can be so difficult to come out to your fam...

I Get to Define My Own Family

Amelia | Posted 02.02.2016 | Queer Voices
Amelia

Many of those people are LGBT, but they aren't our chosen family because they are LGBT or in spite of it; they are our chosen family because they are good people, the kind of men and women who set good examples for our kids, the kind of people we want them to grow up to be.

Don't Be Your Child's First Bully

Amelia | Posted 02.02.2016 | Queer Voices
Amelia

By hiding photos of a son dressed up as Minnie Mouse or Scooby-Doo's Daphne, a parent is sending the message that she is ashamed of her child. That's a message that gets received, quickly and with dire consequences.

Accept And Tolerate My Gay Kid? That's Not Good Enough

Amelia | Posted 02.02.2016 | Queer Voices
Amelia

With politicians there is a lot talk of "acceptance" and "tolerance" when it comes to homosexuality. I accept the fact that I have to pay taxes. I tolerate the fact that I have to go to the dentist. Why should either of those words apply to how a parent feels about their child?

When My 8-Year-Old Gay Son Taught His Class About Harvey Milk

Amelia | Posted 02.02.2016 | Queer Voices
Amelia

On this day in a second-grade classroom in the Midwest, Harvey Milk was on the same stage as Frederick Douglass, Sojourner Truth and Elizabeth Cady Stanton as an 8-year-old gay boy who has never seen the need for a closet told Milk's story.

To Move Or Not To Move?

Amelia | Posted 02.02.2016 | Queer Voices
Amelia

As our children grow, we look around and wonder, "Is this the right place for us to be? Is this where we want our children to grow up? What is the environment we've chosen teaching them?" These questions were heightened after our oldest son started identifying as gay at a young age.

If My Gay Son Realizes He's Really My Straight Son, So What?

Amelia | Posted 02.02.2016 | Queer Voices
Amelia

If our son realizes at a later date that he isn't gay, I won't be embarrassed. No matter who he is, we want him to know that we love him. And whom he loves and is attracted to doesn't change a thing. If anything, we are setting an example to all our kids that our love really is unconditional.

A New Coming-Out Story

Amelia | Posted 02.02.2016 | Queer Voices
Amelia

My son never lived in the proverbial closet. He's never thought of himself any other way or pretended that he did. So what do I think he was coming out of? His narrative is so different from the ones that came before that I don't even have the terminology to talk about it appropriately.

Raising A Gay Son Is The Same As Raising A Straight Son, Except When It's Not

Amelia | Posted 02.02.2016 | Queer Voices
Amelia

Yes, at times it is different. At times it is hard, emotional and challenging. It's not something people are used to seeing, which can make them uncomfortable, so it requires extra work of me as a parent. But that doesn't mean it's bad. And he's worth it. All my kids are.

Some Parents Might Not Want A Gay Kid, But I Do

Amelia | Posted 02.02.2016 | Queer Voices
Amelia

On Dec. 10 a conservative politician in the UK commented, "I think most parents would prefer their children not to be gay." As the mom of an openly gay son, that comment pisses me off, but it doesn't surprise me. It's something I have heard many times before.

When Your Favorite Childhood Films Are A Little More Homophobic Than You Remembered

Amelia | Posted 02.02.2016 | Queer Voices
Amelia

As a parent, one of the great joys is exposing my kids to all the stuff I liked when I was little. We have a built-in excuse to buy things like The Goonies or The NeverEnding Story. But a few times that we've gone back to our childhood favorites, we've had a harsh wake-up call.

Being Thankful And Honoring Those Who Made Today Possible

Amelia | Posted 02.02.2016 | Queer Voices
Amelia

Hundreds and thousands of people have fought for equal rights, and I am thankful to them all. Their hard work, sacrifice and struggle brought us here, to a place where my little boy can know who he is and tell me without shame -- and be unaware that shame could even be a factor.

My 7-Year-Old Son Wants a 'Likes Boys' T-Shirt, and Here Is Why He's Going to Get It

Amelia | Posted 02.02.2016 | Queer Voices
Amelia

Since our son announced he was gay, we have been fighting for his right to be himself. We make sure those in our life and his are on board, and he's never given the message that something is wrong with him.

Conversations I Don't Want To Have With My Son

Amelia | Posted 02.02.2016 | Queer Voices
Amelia

I think every parent has those discussions they don't want to have with their children. But now that my oldest son, at 7 years old, identifies as gay, I find myself facing a whole new set of things I just don't want to say to him.

Back-To-School Time With A Gay Kid

Amelia | Posted 02.02.2016 | Queer Voices
Amelia

We don't have a script to follow, because we are the only ones we know with a gay kid in elementary school. But the fact remains: We are our child's biggest advocates, and we need to be that for him.

Why My Son Can't Be A Boy Scout

Amelia | Posted 02.02.2016 | Queer Voices
Amelia

Soon his friends will be Cub Scouts, and he may come to me and ask to join. Then Bruce and I will have the unpleasant task of sitting a little boy down and figuring out the least painful way of saying, "Baby, they don't want you." And my little boy will know firsthand what discrimination is.

Our First Pride As Parents Of A Young Gay Son

Amelia | Posted 02.02.2016 | Queer Voices
Amelia

We laughed at our presumption that our son would have some big moment during this first Pride after telling us he was gay. We realized the day was exactly the way it should have been. It was a fun, family day. It wasn't a revelation-worthy day for our son, because it was just his life.

A Not-So-Proud Moment For Mom

Amelia | Posted 02.02.2016 | Queer Voices
Amelia

My son is who he is, and I have never wanted him to be anyone else. I am proud of him, and try I encourage him to be himself and empower him, but here I was, just a few feet away, willing him to hold part of himself back. The shame came over me instantly.

The Father I Want To Be

Dave | Posted 02.02.2016 | Queer Voices
Dave

Is there any harm in raising kids who treat gay people with respect? If our son turns out to be straight, there is still a very good chance he will have a gay classmate or a young gay neighbor. Do we want him to ridicule this child or sit by and watch others do it?

Why -- And How -- We Accept Our Gay Son As Devout Mormon Parents

Jane and Bob | Posted 02.02.2016 | Queer Voices
Jane and Bob

As a faithful LDS/Mormon family, we expected our son Will to follow a certain path. He would grow up, get married, start a family, and be a faithful and active member of the church. But for our family, a different story began around the time our son Will turned 2.

My Son Does Not Need To Prove Anything

Amelia | Posted 02.02.2016 | Queer Voices
Amelia

When my 7-year-old son first announced to us he was gay, the response from the people in our lives, the people who are important to us, was overwhelmingly positive. But now that time has passed, about six months, a few people are starting to change their tune.

Moms: Above All Else, Just Say No

Dr. Cindi Love | Posted 02.02.2016 | Queer Voices
Dr. Cindi Love

The challenge for moms and dads is complex. Will they support their LGBT children unconditionally and bring on the rejection of their churches, workplaces, and family members, or will they adopt Pastor Sean's methods and hope for a "conversion"?

A Father's Reaction To His Very Young Gay Son

Dave | Posted 02.02.2016 | Queer Voices
Dave

Over the past few months my wife has been asked numerous times what I think about our 7-year-old son identifying as gay. The idea that I would be disappointed/angry/suicidal that my son identifies as gay offends me, both as a father and simply as a human.

Talking To Other Parents About My Gay 7-Year-Old Son

Amelia | Posted 02.02.2016 | Queer Voices
Amelia

I am finding myself having a lot of conversations with parents lately. Part of me is annoyed that I feel I should, but the larger part of me knows it's necessary. An out first grader isn't exactly an average kid. I have the only one I know. It surprises people, and they have questions.