The ability to recognize the positive contribution that one's partner makes to the needs of the relationship, rather than holding the perspective that they are the cause of the "problem" is the core variable that determines whether the couple is headed for disaster or for mutual fulfillment.
I had just gotten my head above water. Why, oh why, did he have to appear? Why, oh why, was I forged as an all-or-nothing human? Couldn't I just have dinner and some casual sex like normal people? Did I have to want to rip everyone's face off and subsume myself?
I was a total chameleon in my relationships. If someone else liked something, I liked it. Anything they believed, I believed. Any interest they had, I would take up myself.
My boyfriend misses holidays, birthdays and anniversaries. He spends Thanksgiving, most years, on the other side of the world.
Why spend our time pursuing someone who may be attractive but has nothing in common with us. It happens, beauty is hard to deny. But beauty can also be a trap. We can pay too much attention to the fitness and beauty of a person and miss the inner-connection.
What does it mean to love pink, to feel that pull towards cuddling and dressing up dolls? Why did I think I had to choose between Jo March and Cindy Brady? Through many discussions with my women friends, I concluded that wanting to be a princess is about wanting to feel valuable and valued for who we are.
It became my go-to response and elicited laughs every time. Unfortunately, it stopped being a joke when, somewhere along the line, it became my reality.
We are masters at digesting thoughts in 140-character sentences, stalking an ex lover, keeping up with the Ebola outbreak, scoring a Soul Cycle bike, finding a city's best ramen.
Fortunately, you can make the choice to not settle for a mediocre relationship. Don't get me wrong, it's not about selecting self-serving relationships but rather it's about choosing honest, genuine ones with people who value you as much as you do him/her.
Whether the glitch is in the value or the glitch is in the goal, we have several techniques in NLP to reconcile the two. When your values and goals are in alignment, you'll no longer feel frustrated as you pursue what you desire.
It's tempting to jump into relationships when we meet someone we believe is wonderful. But if it takes a few months to begin gauging someone's character, and two to three years to truly know them, we are setting ourselves up for disaster if we commit too soon.
The dreaded, difficult "relationship talk." By now, we've all had them, and they're still hard to navigate. Whether they're about money, sex or family issues, these talks make problems at the office look like a walk in the park.
Relationships are always a mix; they're woven from golden shining moments and niggling annoyances, big whack-you-over-the-head disasters and then, just when you were about to give up, a deep sense of tenderness, connection and certainty reminds you of why you fell in love in the first place.
Most couples deal with a roller coaster of financial issues, the craziness of raising families, and when and how to sneak in a little nooky time on a daily basis. Something has to keep Jerry Springer busy, right? Wrong. What actually brings out love's boxing gloves might surprise you.
My husband, David, and I have been married 37 years. What's the secret to the longevity of our relationship? I'm no expert, but I know I have never stopped dating David! We are still in love and enjoy being with each other.
Our modern world still conforms to an archaic double standard when it comes to the assumptions surrounding a woman who's single. When a high-value man is single he's viewed as "playing the field" or hasn't met the "right woman." When a high-value woman is single it's assumed to mean that men don't want her (for good reason.)