I do want to keep exercise in my day and be the healthiest, highest functioning version of myself that I can be. But when I have an extra hour or two at the end of the day, I don't want to spend it making sure my body looks perfect. I want to do something that will add value to me as person on a deeper level, beneath the surface of rock-hard abs.
In my entire 40 years, I've never once been high or intoxicated. Still, an AA program would serve me well. Approval Anonymous. A support group that could help eliminate my need to be accepted by other people and direct me toward the sense of self that I am just beginning to claim after decades of living inauthentically.