We don't just become who we are. The outcome is very much influenced by decisions we have made along the way, people we've observed and seeds that have been planted personally or by others about our abilities, limitations, preferences, values and principles.
The fact is that not all lies are bad, and there really is a time to lie. I'd even go so far as to say that a little lying can be healthy. As Lord Byron once said, "What is a lie? 'Tis but the truth in masquerade."