While I could sit around and complain about how hard of a job it is and how I never imagined my life taking this path, I'm not going to. Partly because one of my New Year's resolutions is to complain less and partly because it's not all bad. In fact, there are certain advantages to the single parenting gig.
I love love. I like to read about it. I want to see it in my TV shows and movies. I couldn't be happier (if slightly jealous) for my friends and family who have found it. And divorce hasn't changed that. If anything, it may have strengthened my feelings about falling into a true and selfless kind of love.
Hateful, mean pictures show up on the Internet every day, with people gleefully leaping in to add their ugly voices to the fray. But if we can counter that -- if we can think about the human side and the human cost of those pictures, we can make the world a kinder place and we can all be just a little better.
I am living someone else's life, she thinks to herself. I am working towards someone else's goal, not mine. She is not happy, not fulfilled in anyway. She feels like a hamster on a wheel that is spinning at an ever increasing rate and yet she cannot get off. These are the thoughts that creep into her mind as she stares at the cars stuck in the rush hour traffic ahead of her.
I'll bet you thought you'd never get here -- the big ONE SIX. DRIVER'S LICENSE AGE!!! Woohoo!!! (That's me -- you go ahead and make whatever sound you want). A junior in high school. Looking seriously at colleges, trying to imagine yourself living somewhere else, on your own. Pretty heady stuff, isn't it?