I've been in love, lust and like, had crushes that didn't crush back and had my heart broken. I've lost it all and won big. Throughout, I have never believed in "perfect" anything. Did I mention that I do not believe in soul mates?
Girls of any age who were brought up on a steady diet of rom-coms and Jane Austen have dreamed about meeting The One since we were old enough to play with Barbie. There's that glance from across a crowded bar. The soundtrack. The meet-cute with snappy dialogue.
Not until finding the box of three hundred or more letters written by my dad, as a young soldier, to my mom, his new bride. As I read through them, something truly magical happened again. That young couple who met on the beach came alive for me.
Every now and then, I wake up and wonder who the guy is in my bed and why there is a minivan parked in my driveway. I love the guy, and our daughter, and our cute little house in suburbia. But sometimes I do wonder how the hell I wound up in this life.
One of the best ways to think of a relationship on the rocks is to reflect on your expectations for your relationship. What are they? What is it that you really want from your partner? What could your partner do now that would -- from your point of view -- make the relationship work again?
Ed came here from Romania in his mid-50s as a penniless political refugee fleeing the brutal communist regime. All they would let him take out of the country was $100, one suitcase and the clothes on his back.
I thought the clouds would part and the angels would descend with a Vera Wang gown. Reality? Not so much. No one ever tells you how to handle the purgatory between knowing you found The One and Saying I Do.
You attract a mirror image of the energy you give out, so when you keep complaining about attracting the wrong person, you have to thank those people for shedding light on something you may need to change about yourself.