In this day and age we live our lives online. And of course this naturally extends to our romantic lives whether that be dating, married or in a committed relationship. This has happened so quickly that we haven't necessarily taken the precautions to protect ourselves. And because we live our lives online, it is only natural that our romantic encounters, relationships and prospects also have an online existence.
Everything about domestic violence and harassment is about power -- robbing the victim of any sort of agency and giving the abuser the feeling that he or she has the right to do what he/she is doing. The dual face of domestic violence perpetrated through threats in person and online is that there is literally nowhere in my daily life that I feel completely safe anymore.
I built a Chrome extension that found thousands of Venmo users PUBLICLY revealing their failed dates, late night food runs, losing poker streaks, and more. After a few uses of Venmo, I noticed that the app was giving me the option to share transactions (minus the amount) publicly on my Venmo newsfeed.
Do you know people who haven't officially joined Facebook but are, in fact, looking on the site everyday? You know who I'm talking about. They snoop around Facebook without actually creating an account themselves? Instead, these folks use a spouse's or friend's username and password. Or they open completely fictitious accounts.
His name was Constantine Kargas. I had never met him or spoken to him. He was a complete stranger to me. And yet he believed we were soul mates, destined to be together. In fact, he was planning our wedding. For years I was terrorized by a stalker whose sick attentions might have derailed my career -- and ended my life.
Coercive control is a strategy some people use to dominate their intimate partners and get their way. It usually includes some combination of isolation, degradation, micromanagement, manipulation, stalking, physical abuse, sexual coercion, threats, and punishment. Not all of these tactics are always present.