I'm a stepmom and proud of it. But, I truly believe there's nothing blended about marrying someone who brings kids to the marriage while you also bring kids to the marriage. Or, later the two of you add a kid to the mix, which is what I can speak to. Stirred, mixed, grouped together, cobbled, mingled, but not blended.
Did you know that only about one-third of stepfamily marriages last? The statistic begs the question: What is the deciding factor between the families that make it and those that do not?