iOS app Android app

Susan Stiffelman

Is It OK to Use My Smartphone As a Reward?

Susan Stiffelman | Posted 01.23.2014 | Parents
Susan Stiffelman

Relying on your digital device as a bribe, threat or diversion is not a reliable, long-term parenting strategy.

Trickle Down Happiness: Why Mom Needs a Little Self-Care

Susan Stiffelman | Posted 12.22.2013 | Parents
Susan Stiffelman

Many parents are so consumed with checking things off their list (dinner, homework, bath) that they stop having enjoying their kids.

6 Tips to Help Parents Put Down Their Phones, Now

Susan Stiffelman | Posted 01.23.2014 | Parents
Susan Stiffelman

Our phones offer tremendous stimulation. For parents who are with little ones for hours on end, they can seem like a lifeline.

Checking in Without Checking Out

Susan Stiffelman | Posted 12.01.2013 | Parents
Susan Stiffelman

Most children feel shortchanged when it comes to a parent's attention; they never feel they get enough. When they have to compete with your job (or your smartphone), they are likely to feel resentful and hurt.

How Can I Get My Kids to Keep Their Word?

Susan Stiffelman | Posted 11.23.2013 | Parents
Susan Stiffelman

Pushing and pulling kids to do things they have to do can be maddening. It is very important that we raise our children to be true to their word.

Stepdaughter's Mom Is Threatening to Send Her to a Distant School

Susan Stiffelman | Posted 11.17.2013 | Parents
Susan Stiffelman

13-year-olds are reluctant to confide in their parents. One of the benefits of being a "bonus parent" is that you can act as a sounding board for your stepdaughter to talk freely about the things she's struggling to sort out.

My Kids Can't Eat Out Without Being Plugged In!

Susan Stiffelman | Posted 11.10.2013 | Parents
Susan Stiffelman

Let your children know that your decision is not negotiable, and that if they don't think they can join you as pleasant dinner companions, they can stay home with grandma or a babysitter (without access to computers or TV).

Can I Teach My Son to Have Boundaries When Mine Are So Flimsy?

Susan Stiffelman | Posted 11.04.2013 | Parents
Susan Stiffelman

There are many ways to help a child establish better boundaries, but the most important one is built upon what he observes in the behavior of those he watches most carefully -- his parents and primary caregivers.

Tired of Fighting My Teen to Wake Up in the Morning

Susan Stiffelman | Posted 10.27.2013 | Parents
Susan Stiffelman

Many kids tune out a well-meaning parent's efforts to get them to rise and shine, going back to sleep over and over.

Help! How Can I Get My Kid to Do His Homework?

Susan Stiffelman | Posted 10.21.2013 | Parents
Susan Stiffelman

By letting your son know that you're on his side, rather than lecturing him for not being more enthusiastic about his school work, you can help him get his work done without the drama that wears everyone out.

How to Avoid Meltdowns Without Caving in

Susan Stiffelman | Posted 10.13.2013 | Parents
Susan Stiffelman

When you see signs of your child heading toward a tantrum and you realize you aren't going to be able to stay cool, calm and collected, there is a way to "give in" to your child (thereby avoiding the meltdown) without teaching her that whenever she wants something, all she needs to do is yell.

Make the Car Fighting Stop!

Susan Stiffelman | Posted 10.05.2013 | Parents
Susan Stiffelman

he restrictions that come from being strapped in and stuck in a car are a terrible fit for kids. There are, however, things you can do to make the ride more enjoyable.

Why Can't 'No' Mean 'No'?

Susan Stiffelman | Posted 09.29.2013 | Parents
Susan Stiffelman

My 13-year-old son refuses to take 'no' for an answer. No matter how much I explain why I won't raise his allowance or let him watch an inappropriate movie, he follows me around, demanding better reasons. It makes me so angry! Why can't 'no' mean 'no'?"

'You Can't Be Friends With Anyone But Me!'

Susan Stiffelman | Posted 09.23.2013 | Parents
Susan Stiffelman

By helping your daughter honor herself and stand up for what she deserves in a loving friendship, you will be giving her the tools for healthy relationships down the road.

My Son's Dreaminess Slows Everyone Down!

Susan Stiffelman | Posted 09.07.2013 | Parents
Susan Stiffelman

In a different time and place, his behavior would be seen as entirely age-appropriate. In today's world, however, his slow pace is a problem because life moves so quickly.

My Son Doesn't Want to Visit Me This Summer

Susan Stiffelman | Posted 09.01.2013 | Parents
Susan Stiffelman

Your son is sending you a message about his sadness. How you respond will either help him grow into a man who can feel difficult emotions and communicate them in healthy ways, or someone who represses painful feelings and withdraws his love when he has been hurt.

Teen Daughter Wants Dad To Stop Posting Photos!

Susan Stiffelman | Posted 08.18.2013 | Parents
Susan Stiffelman

It's one thing to be a teen and have your parents share photos of you with family friends by forcing them to look through photo albums of your most recent ballet performance. But it's another thing altogether to have what you consider to be unflattering photos posted online.

My Son is Losing Friends Because He's a Know-It-All!

Susan Stiffelman | Posted 08.11.2013 | Parents
Susan Stiffelman

Quite often, a child who tries to one-up others has learned the behavior from someone he or she looks up to.

My Son Seems So Uncomfortable in His Own Skin

Susan Stiffelman | Posted 08.05.2013 | Parents
Susan Stiffelman

I can't count the number of children and teens I've worked with who genuinely believed they were stupid, despite being brilliant at something outside of a school setting.

My Kids Are Struggling Because of Our Divorce

Susan Stiffelman | Posted 07.29.2013 | Parents
Susan Stiffelman

Adjusting to divorce takes time. Be patient and kind to yourself so you can be there for your kids. If you take things slowly and prioritize your energy so you're focusing on the things that nourish you all, you and your family will get through this rough time.

Helping Children Adjust to a Move

Susan Stiffelman | Posted 07.22.2013 | Parents
Susan Stiffelman

Most children thrive on the familiar. The experience of beging tossed around by the changes that come with a move can feel overwhelming, even if there are great things about a new house or neighborhood. Here are some thoughts about how to help your children adjust.

My 6-Year-Old Got in Trouble at School and Isn't Sorry!

Susan Stiffelman | Posted 07.15.2013 | Parents
Susan Stiffelman

When we require our kids to say the obligatory words, "I'm sorry" without actually meaning them, we teach them that words alone can let them off the hook and they don't have to genuinely feel empathy for whoever they have wronged.

Are Words Enough When My Child's Upset?

Susan Stiffelman | Posted 07.08.2013 | Parents
Susan Stiffelman

Children become resilient by living through loss and disappointment. Help your little boy use his words to express upset while providing him the opportunity to get his feelings out.

My 13-Year-Old and I Are Both in Hormone Hell!

Susan Stiffelman | Posted 06.30.2013 | Parents
Susan Stiffelman

Your daughter's moods will even out, your hormones will stabilize and you will get through this rough patch.

How Can I Get My Daughter to Sleep in Her Bed Instead of Mine?

Susan Stiffelman | Posted 06.24.2013 | Parents
Susan Stiffelman

There's nothing quite as refreshing as a great night's sleep to help us recover from our day and restore our energy. When children have trouble sleeping, it impacts not only their sleep (and mood), but their weary parents'.