It's hard to imagine, but even if you never fully forgive your cheating spouse, your feelings of anger will likely soften over time. It would be tragic if you sent a destructive message now that you couldn't take back later.
The kids had no idea what was coming. As far as they were concerned, it was another trip to the beach. I'm not even sure they were surprised when I called them all together on the second night for a family meeting. I told them how I had an affair.