I worry that at times you are feeling the brunt of my childhood trauma, because you have now become my teacher; your love and existence my lessons. Is that normal for every parent? I don't know, and that in itself is part of what is most terrifying about being your mom. I know nothing about normalcy.
It is possible to find yourself again and rekindle your joy when life takes a detour. Above all, it's a chance to shed unwanted layers, let go of what no longer serves you, and highlight the things that truly make you happy. Life ending up in a different place than you ever imagined can have a happy ending!