Foxes and other wild animals have been raising teens for eons. Their dependents learn to fly in the dark, adapt to shifting environments and feed themselves. If they can teach their teens/tweens to survive on this planet, you can too.
I don't even know how to describe people's sense of humor today, but I can tell you one thing: it sure isn't that simple. Take a look at some of the viral YouTube videos from the past few years and you'll see what I mean.