"Creativity is a crushing chore and a glorious mystery. The work wants to be made, and it wants to be made through you." -- Elizabeth Gilbert
I have known fear for a very long time. I have let fear seep inside me to defend my limitations and my weaknesses. I have managed to let it cultivate in my professional and personal life in the past, making it the most monotonous thing about me. It has been demonic, it has been beautiful, and I am still learning to live creatively and passionately as it continues to follow me around. It has been almost two years since I officially introduced myself to soulful expression, but there are still tough days.
Every one of us wants to bring something to the table. I have dreams and ambitions and parts of me that are raw and authentic, we all do. But fear, he is right there, alongside every idea, there to make me question my every move. Here's the thing about fear: it is not original. It is a nonreturnable package given the minute we start our lives. There is no talent or special credit or round of applause for having it. But I am continually learning to never be ashamed of it, and more importantly, to work with it, not against it.
Nothing scares your fear more than the unknown. It absolutely despises uncertainty. When something out of your comfort zone becomes an idea, fear instantly triggers its overprotective and insanely controlling instinct in your mind. Take a breath. Deal with it. Talk to it. Tell your fear," I understand your purpose, but I am going to look beyond you." Literally say it out loud because this is a mental practice. It took me A LOT of discipline. Surround yourself with the doers and creators because your insides deserve that fuzzy warm feeling after a few exchanges of passionate talks with some good friends. If you let fear win, you are losing an opportunity to grow bigger and better. You lose your chance to make magic.
Let me tell you a story. When I posted by first piece on The Huffington Post last year, I lost my mind (in a totally good way). I was so unbelievably scared to show my most vulnerable side to people, but here was my first masterpiece written with every bit of my heart and soul for the entire world to read. After an outburst of personal messages and stories filling up my inbox, I realized what I had done. I had created something that not only stirred my spirit, but made people open their hearts to an outsider and bravely let me in. That was the most compelling moment -- watching my words connect to people that have felt, were feeling, or yearned to feel.
Voilà, my magic made some other magic happen.
Fast-forward to a few months later, I not only managed to publish three additional pieces of my work, but also was blessed with an opportunity to work with an extremely talented writing partner who has pushed me past my creative comfort zone immensely. We are currently working on our first independent film script. Collaborative magic? Yes, please.
This is what makes writing so special to me. No matter how mainstream, cliché, or chaotic I write, knowing that I am creating something is always the bigger picture, and it makes me feel good in all the right places. My mind has been able to open doors to this galactic world of thoughts that I always wanted to write about. My fear always holds a big red stop sign and tells me I don't have a good enough story, but I have to kindly request it to step aside and let creativity and I continue our journey. There is a reason we were told to take a ride on the magic school bus my friends.
Because everything in life is temporary. That is something extremely important to remember folks. You will never know the significance of your creations until you actually put it to work.
So wave your wand and make your magic.