It was probably almost forty years ago that on a very hot and humid Saturday morning in Ardsley, New York, our air conditioner decided to have a coronary and die. It didn't help that it was a July 4th weekend and I did not know what to do. Everyone was hot and unhappy, including Annabelle, our Maltese puppy, my wife and my kids.
We called a variety of companies to come and fix the device and only one Company was open. They sent us a tech guy to look at our air conditioner and after about fifteen minutes he reported that the unit was indeed dead, and that we should plan a funeral for it and that he could get us a new unit in a few days for a few gazillion dollars. I asked the tech if there was another choice and asked again if he possibly repair it, and he agreed to give the unit one last try and I expect give the dead unit "mouth to mouth resuscitation."
He emerged from the bowels of the unit thirty minutes later saying that he had revived the air conditioner, and that it would live to cool us again for what he hoped would be a long time. We were thrilled even when he told us the repair would only cost a half a gazillian dollars.
It was an hour or so later that I realized that the tech guy had probably "taken" me and there I was stuck with a bill that I had already paid. We would at least be cool for the weekend.
When our beloved President sold us the WMD driven war in Iraq, I along with many were so happy to go to war to keep Iraqi atomic bombs from raining down on the Bronx as well as Beverly Hills. He scared us in order to get what he wanted from us.
There were of course all of the other "fear driven" things that the President sold us as well. The Patriot act will only erode your liberties a little bit but it will keep you safe.
What are these "crooks" up to now? What is their latest "let me scare you to death and then I can do whatever I choose to do to you." What a fail proof system!
When Secretary Paulson arrived on the scene in front of a Banking committee or two he told us that "the sky was falling" and would indeed do that if we didn't pony up a paltry three quarters of a trillion dollars IMMEDIATELY. This may indeed be needed, but based on the history of the Bush administration who knows what is real or not.
Secretary Paulson looked strangely like my air conditioning tech guy, but it was probably my imagination running away with things.
I do believe that if Secretary Paulson is not my air conditioning guy, he is really Professor Harold Hill from "Music Man" and he has sold us band instruments and uniforms. He did this while he hummed this song from the play.
"You Got Trouble."
"Well, either you're closing your eyes
To a situation you do now wish to acknowledge
Or you are not aware of the caliber of disaster indicated
By the presence of a pool table in your community.
Ya got trouble, my friend, right here,
I say, trouble right here in River City."
Does three quarters of a trillion just show up one day as "missing?" Hadn't anyone noticed that there was a problem a couple of months ago? And this is in addition to a paltry few hundred billion that we have recently dispersed. Is it that everyone thought that the money we need now was in another pants pocket and it wasn't?
I know that this is a silly question to ask concerning a trivial sum of money, but good grief!
The question for now and not for later is: Who the hell is responsible for this and it better not be put off with a "you need to understand that all of this is very complicated."
Where the hell is the Sheriff?
Who should go to jail?
Who was watching the "store?"
Why isn't there a cop around when you need one?"
With my knowledge of economics only slightly less than Senator McCain, let me ask a simple question. If we do indeed have three quarters of a trillion dollars that we need to shore up things in a variety of places, what in heavens name happened to the three quarters of a trillion dollars that are somehow unavailable to us,
WHO HAS THIS MONEY AND HOW CAN WE GET IT BACK FROM THOSE WHO HAVE IT?
In any event, I have decided that I am moving back to my old house in Ardsley. I wonder if the air conditioner is still working.
I wonder how many band uniforms and instruments you can buy for a paltry trillion dollars.
Norman Horowitz
Seller of Television Content