Roadkill: OffTheBus's Ongoing RoundUp of the Awkward, the Ugly, and the Just Plain Weird

Edited by Richard Riehl and Denise Wheeler. Kirsten Anderson, River Curtis-Stanley, Jodi Lampert, Julie Pierce, and Debbi Plummer also contributed to this issue.

"We Didn't Think You'd Come": Vegan candidate Dennis Kucinich complained that not being invited to the Iowa Democratic Steakfry was part of the plot by Power Dems to put down his campaign. Don't worry, Dennis, they'll feel plenty left out when you're headlining the San Francisco Salad Toss.

"Is there less to Thompson than meets the eye, or is he just channeling The Gipper?": In Friday's campaign swing through Florida, Fred Thompson said he's "dead set" against allowing babies of illegal immigrants to be used as anchors for "chain immigration," but didn't want to blame them for where they're born and didn't know how, or even if he wanted to change that part of the 14th Amendment that makes American-born babies automatic citizens. He may be new to the campaign trail, but he's already discovered how to avoid flip-flopping by floundering.

"Romney fears the ghost of Brownie if Clinton health plan succeeds": In a speech in Iowa Saturday, Romney warned, "She'll have health care run by Washington. I don't want to have the people who did the Katrina cleanup taking care of my health care." Heckuva non sequitur, Mitt.

"An Honest Mitt-stake?": Apparently the Mittsters have been conducting covert operations against the Brownback campaign. An Iowa GOP honcho smacked the Brownbackers as having "little buzz" in Iowa...without revealing he's a paid get-out-the-vote-guy for the Romney Gang. We are shocked, shocked, to discover this kind of shenanigans in a presidential campaign.

"What's that you're smokin' in yer pipe, Fred?": Asked about energy policy in Sioux City, Iowa, last week, Thompson replied, "We've got to learn to skip and chew gum at the same time." Well, that pretty much clears everything up...except for the greenhouse gases.

"Clinton writes off the Cowboy Union": Hillary says, "The day after I'm elected," she'll send people around the world to announce, "The era of cowboy diplomacy is over!" Buy the lady a ticket to "3:10 to Yuma!"

"How many votes can you fit on a stick?": Chris Dodd talks about the Iowa State Fair: "I had no idea what you could put on a stick in this state." He mentions the deep-fried Twinkies and Snickers bars, then notes the irony that Harkin has sponsored multiple nutrition bills in Congress. Okay, can we just get over that one? Pay attention everyone: It's not Heaven, it's Iowa. Got it? Now pass one of those Twinkies ...

"Richardson shows his true colors": Mystery solved at the Harkin Steakfry. What was up with the rainbow array of t-shirts Richardson supporters were wearing? Turns out they were color-coded "by issue...We have orange ones for sportsmen, like blaze orange," says a staffer. "There's khaki brown for veterans and purple...I don't know, must be wine drinkers for Richardson."

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Comments

[andvoodootoo]

...Romney warned, "She'll have health care run by Washington. I don't want to have the people who did the Katrina cleanup taking care of my health care." I've got news for ol' Mitt: The Katrina clean up was done (and is still being done) by Mexicans. If it wasn't for the Mexicans, we'd be S.O.O.L. Does he seriously think the feds have done anything for New Orleans other than abandon us?