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Ora Nadrich Headshot

Is Divorce In The Water?

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I don't come from a divorced family so maybe I'll never understand it as well as people who do, but even when I was growing up, I don't ever recall as many people getting divorced as I hear about today. Is there something in the water that's causing this? Or has what was once considered a sad outcome -- especially for the children -- become so commonplace and mainstream today that when we hear about it, it just seems normal and no longer shocking as it used to be when a couple who you thought would be together forever, suddenly is getting divorced?

Citing "Irreconcilable differences" means that you are unable to live in harmony with one another because of the inability to compromise, making you incompatible. But that seems over used and almost too general for the staggering amount of divorces there are these days. I'm expecting to hear new terms for why people are splitting up like: "Doesn't floss," or "Doesn't like sushi as much as I do," or maybe even "Snoring."

I understand that the reasons behind why people decide to part ways is personal and different for everyone, and what goes on behind closed doors -- or should I say on reality shows today -- is truly between the two people who no longer want to stay together (and no one else's business really). But if more and more people are choosing to break up for reasons that more often than not don't seem terribly serious, and they aren't making much of an effort to find a way to work through their problems or differences, will it become too easy to walk out the door rather than stay together? And if that's the case, will marriage itself become an anomaly eventually? I wonder.

I'm not saying that there aren't legitimate reasons why people choose to divorce, and even though I'm not a product of it myself, I fully understand that sometimes -- even if it causes the children temporary sadness -- it's best to end a marriage that isn't working, no matter how hard you may try to fix it. Some marriages are simply unsalvageable.

What I would like to hear more of though is that people are genuinely trying to stay together and finding ways to solve their problems as a couple -- the "we" they decided to become when they took their wedding vows. That,"for better or for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health" -- or whatever their vows were -- they stuck it out because it was worth it to "love and cherish each other" more than flossing, sushi, or crazy-making snoring. Marriage is worth saving, and I hope it doesn't become abnormal for people to stay together. If that's what ends up happening, then maybe there is something in the water.