The following comes from one of the real-guy bloggers in the Dating Without Drama community.
Everyone has relationship issues. Honestly, I feel that men and women share a lot of the same issues, but just look at some of them differently and possibly rank them in a different order of importance.
The list I compiled is made up of issues that all of us guys face and talk about amongst ourselves. You aren't going to find lots of relationship advice articles in Cosmo that cover these things, but I am sure plenty of bartenders have heard guys griping about these issues over a few pints at night.
In no particular order... here are the biggest relationship issues for men:
#1 - Attraction
This is always a hot-button issue after we've been in a relationship for awhile. Honestly, we get bored sometimes. Some women even say men have a low attention span. I think this is very true for our attraction level.
Attraction levels can go down over time, but it's a two-way street. After a lot of the mystery is gone, so goes some of the attraction. It's not that we don't care -- because we do -- it's just that we need variety.
The solution? Try to mix it up and keep it sexy and mysterious sometimes.
#2 - Sex
The more the better! Seriously though, initially there is a lot of excitement and newness about being with someone, but then usually it morphs into something boring and regular. Oh, it's Friday night -- must be date night.
Sex is a crucial part of a relationship. It needs to be spontaneous, exciting, regular and fun.
If that means telling us what you like or doing things we like, then by all means, go for it!
#3 - Communication
Sometimes it seems like it is impossible to communicate openly and honestly without getting our heads bitten off. We feel like we can't always say what we want to say without starting a fight.
A lot of us give up and don't try. Other times, after too many fights occur, we just start agreeing to avoid a fight. Learning how to communicate well with our partner is always a huge issue because we can sometimes seem to be on a different wavelength.
#4 - Honesty
This is another issue that goes both ways. We have a hard time being completely honest about things sometimes, and this goes for our feelings and our life goals.
Sometimes it is because we don't feel like we can share and still be viewed in the same way. Other times, our ego gets in the way. There can be a lot of pressure to 'be a man' sometimes and that creates issues with really expressing ourselves honestly.
#5 - Insecurity
We are insecure a lot of the time. Even a confident guy can have issues. We worry that women will go away. That is why when you seem happy and content, we focus on other aspects of our lives, but when you seem unhappy, we give you much more focus.
We don't want to lose you. Just because a guy acts tough on the outside doesn't mean he isn't worried about a ton of stuff on the inside. But when you consider that we have issues with communication and honesty, it makes sense that we might hide out insecurity as well.
All of these things cause problems for us and our relationships. Sometimes I think women assume men don't always consider things or think about relationships as much as they do.
But that is incorrect.
Maybe we are more logical about it sometimes, but for the most part we know what causes problems and can be just as lost as you are about how to fix or work on shortcomings.
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