Hillary Clarifies '3AM': "I Was Asleep, Dreaming of Landing In Bosnia Under Sniper Fire"

Senator Hillary Clinton, candidate for the Democratic nomination for president, and former First Lady, today clarified her positions on her 3AM readiness and landing in Bosnia under sniper fire.

"I am asleep at 3AM", said Clinton, "and, like Martin Luthur King before me, I had a dream. I had a dream of arriving in Bosnia, a country too small and too dangerous for President Clinton. I dreamed I arrived under sniper fire, and ducking for cover, but what I was really doing was pulling the bedcovers over my head."

"I misslept", said Clinton, "hard as it may be to believe".

Clinton campaign misspokesman Howard Wolfson further explained Clinton's 3AM claims by noting that "she was ready at 2AM prior to changing the clocks to daylight savings, when 2AM became 3AM, so it was really the same thing, just the wrong month."

Mark Penn, who emphasized he is not part of the campaign, said, "She has a complicated schedule, and looks at her watch hundreds of times a day, so getting one time wrong is no big deal". [After Penn spoke, Hillary loaned her campaign another $100,000 to pay for his time].

Asked about her readiness at 3AM, Clinton said: "The only person in this campaign ready at 3AM is John McCain. At his age, he is awake anyhow."

In other news Bill Richardson, whose accomplishments as Governor include increasing the film industry in New Mexico, believes his endorsement of Obama will lead Mel Gibson to film the sequel to the "Passion of Christ" in Santa Fe. "After Richardson's endorsement", said Gibson, "the stars appear to be aligning in favor of New Mexico. We can have James Carville as Jesus, his wife as Mary Magdelene (ne:Matalin), and Richardson, of course, as Judas."

Comments

[Abie56]

LOL...I thoroughly enjoyed it. Thanks.

[loflof]

fool me once, shame on you. fool me twice, shame on me. fool me three times, youre hillary clinton.

[indie17]

Heh Heh!!

[2Nurselady]

Regarding Hillary Clinton's statement about her trip to Bosnia, I have to say that I would much rather have someone embellish a "war story" than to out-and-out lie to the American people. Barack Obama said Rezko contributed $150,000 to his campaign, but admitted it was actually $250,000 after the Rezko trial began. He was a congregant of Jeremiah Wright's church for 20 YEARS, but said he never heard remarks as those we now know were made by Wright. He reportedly denied that his Chief Financial Adviser met with Canadian officials about NAFTA, then was forced to admit it was true - that a meeting had taken place after being presented with the evidence in a memo.

These are not just embellishments as Hillary Clinton's story may have been, I think they were lies. And, Barack Obama only admitted the truth when his back was against the wall.

Hillary Clinton actually was in Bosnia. There actually was sniper fire before her plane landed. She did have to wear a flack jacket. There were plans to move the reception. She did help refugees in Kosovo. She did play a significant role in the Northern Ireland peace process.

I do not think Barack Obama's record can compare at all. Right now, she is here working for the American people, presenting a plan to help those who are at risk of losing their homes to foreclosure.

Where is Barack? Oh, yeah¦he's relaxing on the beach in St. Thomas.

I think that speaks volumes.

[FINTA]

Well... I do think its a BIG DEAL... you see, because right now, as I type this, we have troops in harms way.. actually being SHOT AT!!! My husband being one of them! So, yes... it is a big deal. Its insulting to the troops.. who put their lives on the line everyday, for her to walk around and try to be big and bad and heroic just for political gain!

And what kind of mother takes her child into something like that anyhow??? Hmmm... you know, when applying for a job, if you lie on your application/resume, you get terminated!!!!!

She LIED...

[Emmaboverry]

Nurse,
The original AP report turned out to be misleading. Our US ambassador accused Canada of "interfering" in election, Canada's PM called for an internal probe, apologized profusely on Obama's account; sources within Canadian government report Hillary's campaign originally gave the wink, wink!

Five meetings, David Gergen and two labor guests (on Hardball today, one for HRC), 120 eyewitnesses at a White House briefing, the First Lady's records all attest to this: Hillary never criticized NAFTA. She did much to help its approval.

Outside corroboration shows Hiillary did not help bring peace to Ireland, negotiate to open borders in Macedonia, land under sniper fire in Bosnia. She did vote "with conviction" to authorize the Iraq war. Two weeks before it began ,she said she was "happy" it would end Iraqi suffering. 150,000 Iraqi civilian deaths later, 750,000 Iraqi refugees surviving by paid fasting and prostitution ---Thousands of our soldiers maimed, brain damaged; 4,000 dead are not happy. She didn't read the intelligence report, but earlier insisted she reviewed the intelligence thoroughly.

She can fudge up her resume; I do mind THIS terrible misjudgment, shrugged off as a mistake ...

The latest? She wouldn't have continued at Obama's church if she had known what the Pastor was about. See the big photo of Pastor Wright at THE WHITEHOUSE, part of a special delegation of church leaders to pray for Bill. P.S. no connection between Obama + Rezco's crimes. See Chicago Tribune. Obama deemed completely open and credible on that one. READ.

[ozamerican]

The definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again but expecting a different result each time. It's time to end the Bush-Clinton-Bush-Clinton madness for the sake of our country's mental health.

[ozamerican]

Was the helicopter forced to make a corkscrew landing? No. Did Hillary run across the tarmack, head down, dodging bullets? No. Was the greeting ceremony cancelled because of sniper fire? No. Hillary didn't "embellish"--she flat out lied. This wasn't the kind of story people embellish when they're entertaining friends at the local pub. This was Hillary's example of why she is qualified to be Commander in Chief.

And Hillary's plan to help people at risk of losing their homes? It's widely considered unworkable, even risible. Who exactly are the subprime borrowers? Will folks have to line up with their credit scores? Where do you drawn the line? Isn't *everyone* who's struggling to make mortgage payments going to argue that their's should be frozen? Plus, do you realize that her plan--to freeze mortgage rates for subprime borrowers--won't change a thing? According to the WSJ, "The evidence suggests that even when troubled borrowers receive a generous reset on their mortgage payments, as many as 40% of those borrowers still eventually default. [This] might only delay the day of reckoning and lead to bigger losses in a falling market."

Her plan may actually make things *worse* for Americans. You can't freeze mortgage rates without causing short term rates to skyrocket.

Her mortgage plan would be as big a blunder as her failed health care policy. Yes, let's call for a working group... and get Alan Greenspan, who caused this mess in the first place, to chair it.

[BitJam]

Clinton lied to the American people in Iowa and New Hampshire when she falsely accused Obama of having a bad pro-choice record.

Clinton lied to the American people in South Carolina when she falsely accused Obama of supporting Republican ideas.

Clinton lied to the American people when she said "Shame on you Barack Obama" and falsely accused him of lying about her previous pro-Nafta support.

Clinton lied to the American people when she claimed that she never supported Nafta.

Clinton continues to lie to the American people, spreading the false story that Obama's stance in Nafta is inconsistent. That story was completely debunked by the Canadian government weeks ago which said that the false reports and memo were blatantly unfair to Obama and reaffirmed that Obama had been totally consistent.

Now she's been caught red-handed lying about her experience and lying about lying about her experience. It is no wonder she is so secretive, she must be sick and tired of lying to the American people day in and day out. The list above contains outright lies. If we include distortions and misleading the American public then the list is almost endless.