What Would I Do if I Were Good Enough?

04/24/2015 01:33 pm ET | Updated Jun 24, 2015

1) I would stop worrying about "my purpose"

I spend a disproportionate amount of my time and energy trying to figure out what I'm "supposed" to do. Is my calling to be a high level civil servant? A yoga teacher? A full-time mom? Am I supposed to grow my business or dedicate myself to my current job? How do I maximize my time on earth to ensure that my life has meaning? If I were good enough, I would trust that being myself, showing up fully in everything I do, actually makes a difference. The form of my career and "path" would matter less, and I would be free to be fully present in the miracles of the present moment.

2) I would give my gifts freely

My concern with being "good enough" has me questioning what my passion project should look like. Should I get on twitter and be more active on Facebook? Do I need to do an app? How much should I charge for my coaching sessions? If I were good enough, I would trust that just by being me, I would be sharing my knowledge and experience with all those I come into contact with. I would worry less about how to share my message because I would know that I am doing so in each moment of every day.

3) I would breathe deeply and fully

If I were good enough, I could relax my body and end the chase. I would settle into the earth beneath me, feel my feet, wiggle my toes and thank the Universe for this beautiful opportunity to be alive. What a gift. I would look around more, take in all that is already here. I would laugh and cry at the time I have spent trying to be better.

4) I would stop blaming my parents. Or anyone for that matter...

The down side of too much self-help and therapy is knowing my story far too well. What went wrong when I was a child, the things that could have been better. Where I earned my traumas, the places and times when I wasn't loved enough. When a difficult moment arises, I can pin it back to that particular moment in time, the girl who picked on me at camp, the time my Dad lost it on me. I blame them for not feeling good enough. But the reality is that I'm the only one that continues to hang on to this belief. If I were good enough I would own my story, and change it. I would take back my power in this moment, and spend my energy loving rather than blaming.

5) I would recognize that I am utterly, totally free

Not feeling good enough binds me and restrains me, makes me feel stuck. I keep wanting to run away to something better, some activity or state of being where I would be full and free. But inside, as long as I don't feel good enough, a new job or a even a spiritual pilgrimage will not bring me the freedom I seek. In seeing that I am good enough, I recognize that all the choices are mine, and that I can choose freedom by bringing presence, kindness and love to any situation. There is no fame or fortune that can bring me the peace I seek, the knowing that I deserve a place in this world. For my belonging is already here, and I make the world better just by being in it.

Being good enough means embodying love. For myself, for others, for the whole world. And this is truly the only purpose I need.