The 7 Habits Of Highly Spiritual People

In truth, that headline is misleading. This list is merely a starter set, not the be-all and end-all assuring spiritual bliss. (And what's so mystical about the number 7 anyway, other than that it appears to boost book sales?) As the unofficial and self-declared Stephen Covey of spirituality, I add this encouraging caveat: just like bad habits you can't break, the same can be said of good habits. Try some of these, reap the rewards -- those would be love for and from others, love for
yourself, love in general -- and they will become addictive, giving rise to many other random acts of spiritual goodness that will take over your life. Happy holy days.

#1
Highly Spiritual People Give Rather Than Take.
To give is indeed divine. Some research on altruism suggests people commit selfless deeds precisely because such acts make them feel good, therefore refuting the notion of selflessness. Hogwash. Is breathing selfish? If we didn't give, and give generously, we'd die. I really believe that. Giving is human nature; it's just that we forget our own Spirit-Nature sometimes. Giving can take many forms; simply paying attention to someone is a gift.

#2
They Say Yes More Than They Say No.
Naysayers are a downer. "No" closes our hearts like cholesterol. (Naturally, this excludes saying "No" to drugs or other self-destructive, noxious or illegal behaviors.) "Yes" affirms life. People
always would rather hear yes rather no. Unless it's when you ask your doctor, "Do I have herpes?"

#3
They See Possibilities, Not Problems.
As Shunryu Suzuki writes: "In the beginner's mind there are many possibilities; in the expert's mind there are few." And this may be the only time you hear Norman Vincent Peale quoted right after Suzuki-roshi, but there is something to the power of positive thinking, if not "The Power of Positive Thinking." Spiritual people are optimists. They believe in belief. They are the lemon-to-lemonade folks, the problems-as-opportunites advocates, the positive spin
Masters.

#4
They Walk A Mile in Your Shoes.
They understand that empathy means feeling another's pain but not so much that they take on others' pain and become another's pain. With that empathy, they tend to know exactly what to say or do for you to make you feel better. In gratitude, we say to them, "You are a saint." Even when we do not mean it literally, it is true -- literally.

#5
They Count Blessings in Small Wonders.
They do not expect Spirit to appear accompanied by fire and brimstone and a big neon sign flashing in the sky. They are not waiting for the Big A-ha. Nor are they waiting for the cure to cancer, the job promotion, or the love of a lifetime. They appreciate the tiny details: the smile of a child, the sparkle in an old person's eyes, the morning's first ray of sunlight. While others have recommended not to sweat the bad small stuff, spiritual people savor the good small stuff.

#6
They Give Compliments Generously, Accept Them with Humility.
There is no limit to people's need for praise and appreciation. I suspect that even Donald Trump deep down is desperate for a compliment. Spiritual people do not see people's "need" for support as a weakness or flaw. They see it as a cry for love, and they comply without hesitation. On the other hand, those who respond to a compliment with grandiose objections and deflections, who cannot accept a compliment with grace, probably feel they are not worthy of it. But they are worthy of it. Even the Don is worthy of it.

#7
They Worship Where and When the Spirit Moves Them.
They don't need a temple or church to practice their spirituality, nor do they need a Sunday morning service at 10 a.m. They don't even need a rabbi or a priest or a lama or sensei. Their spiritual setting is a forest, a beach, a mountain top. Their setting is a movable spiritual feast, for they know the true spiritual setting is within. And it travels with, and within, them wherever they go.

And a year-end bonus:
#8
They Laugh a Lot
Have you noticed? Santa ho-ho-ho's his way down the chimney. The Dalai Lama giggles his way to enlightenment. Alfred E. Neuman has that eternal grin. The Laughing Buddha is, well, laughing. Spiritual people are happy. Not just the smiley-face kind of happy, but the deep-down-content kind of happy. If you have trouble getting to happy, try this trick I learned years ago from no less a sage source than the musical "Bye Bye Birdie": "Just put on a happy face." The act of smiling alone triggers a happy hormonal shift, from "gloomy mask of tragedy" to "spreading sunshine all over the place." And what could be more spiritual than that?

Follow Perry Garfinkel on Twitter: www.twitter.com/Perry Garfinkel

Comments

[NeoAmerican]

RE: And what's so mystical about the number 7 anyway, other than that it appears to boost book sales?

This originated with the 7 holes in the human skull which was then adapted into the 7 spirits of God which flow through them.

[chendri887]

With the exception of and #3 and #8, these are also the characteristics of people with severe codependency and mental illness. My mother exemplifies many of these characteristics, and I would hardly characterize my upbringing as "spiritual," only as "intensely emotionally abusive." Setting no personal boundaries, being a doormat for everyone you meet, and having no self-esteem are hardly recipes for spiritual health.

[wondering]

I thought this article was serious, until I read this:

"Have you noticed? Santa ho-ho-ho's his way down the chimney. The Dalai Lama giggles his way to enlightenment. Alfred E. Neuman has that eternal grin. The Laughing Buddha is, well, laughing. Spiritual people are happy."

Santa and Alfred E. Neuman. Rich.

[desthmoneses]

beneficial in moderation

[geoblack]

The number one characteristic of spiritual persons is the tendency to make generalizations like this bereft of measurement or math.

The number two characteristic is the tendency to believe these kinds of generalizations without questioning them.

[CeeCee]

To my understanding, spiritual means "of the spirit", "relating to sacred matters", and spirit is the life-giving force.

So I'm at a loss to understand this definition: that it means for "Krishna's pleasure" ???

The Dalai Lama is a highly evolved spiritual person. To say otherwise is not to understand the meaning of the term "spiritual."

[CeeCee]

To my understanding, spiritual means "of the spirit", "relating to sacred matters", and spirit is the life-giving force.

So I'm at a loss to understand this definition: . ???

The Dalai Lama is a highly evolved spiritual person. To say otherwise is not to understand the meaning of the term "spiritual."

[edresearcher]

To me, to be spiritual is to try to be more than the human animal that I am. It's easy to live based on human instincts alone, and for many people that's how they live their lives.
The most spiritual man I ever knew was an atheist. He never talked about his personal beliefs, but he lived his life by showing real compassion to his fellow human beings and to the creatures of the earth.

[bookish]

Was Mother Teresa happy? But was she not a spiritual person?

Dark night of the soul, and all that...

[andiammisterbones]

Real Christians act like this, not like Bush...

[skyreader7]

An excellent book to read on this and the spiritual path is The Tibetan Book of Living and Dying by Sogyal Rinpoche. It is an international best seller and spiritual masterpiece.

"Tomorrow or the next life--which comes first, we never know" --an old Tibetan saying.

[LaFilleEnRose]

I think sprititual vs religious activity can be defined today as the inward journey (spiritual) verses the outward (religious) and certainly of the two the spiritual is the one that matters. We don't have to look just to the East for true spirituality or inner spiritual development however. We have our own beautiful traditions. Wasn't it Jesus who said: As a man thinketh in his heart, so is he. Wasn't he, too, all about the inner journey. His Sermon on the Mount was all about just that very thing. Think about #7: wasn't his church often a mountaintop? As I look at that list I think in #6 of the greatest gift ever given. Jesus had no need to experience what he did but his love of others...to show them the way out of their own misery...let him accept even Crucifixion (the ultimate hurt) to show that Love was stronger than all hate. I don't think that his efforts relieved us of any of our own journey, but I think he left one beautiful blueprint, much of which is mentioned in your list above.

I'd also add that many spiritual people are not just optimists. Their inner journey is seeking Someone that can be proven in our lives. Spiritual people may indeed know that they do not need an intermediary -- priest, rabbi etc., or guru -- but can find the Infinite, the Good, the Power the Giver, the Healer within each and every one of us and each day get closer to that Source making one's own world and that of those we touch that much better.

Here here!! to the spiritual seekers.

[grumbles]

AMEN!!!!!!!!!

[Mort]

Excellent article, Perry! Positive, uplifting, and much needed here.

[rue]

The distinction implicitly stated in #7 is essential, I think. This distinction between spirituality and religiosity is important. In my experience many very religious people are the least spiritual beings walking the planet.