7 Signs That Your Child May Be A Victim Of Bullying At School
School bullying continues to be on the rise and is happening at earlier ages. In a recent survey, at least seven out of 10 students claim that they have been bullied at least once at school, according to the U.S. Department of Health and Human Services. And more than half of all bullying incidents -- mental, verbal or physical -- go unreported.
As a parent, how do you know if your child is a victim of bullying? There are some definite warning signs to watch for. The following are seven potential indicators of being bullied:
1. A drastic drop in grades: In many instances of bullying, the victim constantly feels fearful, apprehensive or even terrorized. He or she is more focused on when the next bullying will occur, rather than on the information being presented by the teacher. Class work and tests begin to suffer due to this lack of concentration.
2. Being mean to younger siblings: Because of being bullied, many elementary students will take out their frustrations on younger siblings. You might begin to notice threats, destroying a sibling's toy or a drawing, or shoving.
3. Claims to be sick: If your child asks to stay home from school frequently, but doesn't appear to be sick, he might be being bullied. If his attitude toward school is negative or he insists that you pick him up rather than riding the bus, investigate the situation.
4. Unexplained bruises or injuries: Although all kids will experience bumps and bruises from time to time, if you begin to notice such injuries and your child won't tell you how they happened, this could be a sign of bullying.
5. Asking to bring his lunch: Many bullying incidences occur at lunch time. If your child no longer wants to buy his lunch or is demanding a certain type of sandwich or chips, he might be being forced to hand over his lunch or money to a bully.
6. Sudden mood changes: When being a victim of bullying, a child is under a lot of emotional and mental stress. He just wants to make it through the day and arrive back home. Once home however, as a way of releasing the stress, his emotions are like a wild roller coaster ride. You don't know what's coming with the next turn.
7. Change in sleeping or eating habits: The trauma of being bullied can cause a child to lose his appetite or to begin binge eating. He may experience sleepless nights and suffer from nightmares.
What should you do if you recognize some of these signs in your child? You should first determine if your child is a victim of bullying. A good place to start is the National Crime Prevention Council's website on bullying, which reminds parents, above all, to take the issue seriously.
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Rosalind Wiseman: School Bullying: What You Haven't Heard
However, I did not exhibit ANY of the seven signs listed here. The closest I came to any of them was a shorter temper with my siblings when they were intentionally bothering me.
What I did instead was to withdraw within myself. At school, I would stare at a spot on the wall in an attempt to block out the almost continuous taunting. At home, I would read and do science stuff. I spent a lot of time out in the woods alone or with my brother. But the most obvious thing I did was to complain often that, "Nobody likes me." To which, no adults - not even my parents - listened. When I did fight back, I got in as much trouble as the bully de jour.
Listen to kids. When they say they are being picked on, they mean it.
What to do about the bullies? Is it genetic? I don't think so. I am in the Alyce Miller camp. One generation of carefully brought up children would change the world profoundly.
http://www.mychildsafety.net/signs-your-child-may-be-a-bully.html
I teach antibullying workshops too and it's one of my favorite tools for teachers.
Oh, and they have been in karate for years, because its the only way they are going to learn the discipline not to hit first and the judgment of when and how to hit back wihtout doing permanent damage to someone. We are 1-0, having gotten the best of 2 older kids, 2 grades ahead, who tried to shove around a group of youngsters, including my son. The karate came naturally and the older kids were stunned and embarassed. Funny, how word gets around a playground. Now he and all his friends are left alone.
Hello, Here is a web site you may find helpful. If you find it interesting or helpful, please pass it on;
http://www.bullyonline.org/workbully/amibeing.htm
Parents----Be proactive if you know your child is being bullied. And PLEASE don't turn a blind eye if your child displays signs of being a bully. In either case, be willing to help your kid.
Although, I really think that child bullies have parent bullies. They learn that it's okay at home.
It should go # 3, 4, 7, 6, and then #2 would make it to number 5 in my list and the description should include that it's a sudden unreasonable increase in sibling conflict. Siblings fight all the time.
While I’d love to be able to write that the beatings stopped when I confronted him and fought back, truth is that what I got for fighting back was a series of sound thrashings, and as far as I can tell it stopped because he eventually just got bored with the whole thing.
But here’s the rub; my bully was himself bullied. He had four older sisters, two of them veritable amazons, who would beat and tease him unmercifully. One of their favorite tactics was to lock him out of the house when he had to use the toilet. He’d beg and plead to be let in, and you could hear him sobbing all over the neighborhood. They’d leave him out there till he soiled himself.
So in retrospect I can see why he’d come after me; I was just the bottom of the pecking order. It doesn’t make it right, but I understand why.