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Rabbi Will Berkovitz

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The Priest and the Prostitute: Storytelling as a Holiday Gift to God

Posted: 12/24/2011 9:06 am

Blessed are they who see beautiful things in humble places where others see nothing. --Pissarro

The priest walked past the prostitutes every day. He had no choice. They were stationed along the narrow road across from his seminary in Italy. But it was the older woman who caused him the most agitation. "These young guys went to 'see' her and it really troubled me," he said. "She could have been their mother."

The priest confessed he never spoke with the women, studiously avoided eye contact and did his best to never acknowledge their existence. But as is often the case, willed blindness only works for so long when proximity is coupled with repetition. And one day, while following his usual protocol of denial, the older prostitute dropped something as he was walking past. It bounced to a stop at his foot.

Without thinking, the priest's instinct toward kindness compelled him to pick up the thin wooden object, forcing the encounter he had so dutifully avoided for the past several months. "It was a knitting needle," he said, still sounding surprised. "And out of curiosity, I asked her what she was making." The woman responded, "I'm knitting a tapestry for the alter at my church. It is a gift for God."

Tears welled up in the priest's eyes as he recalled her response. "In my desire to avoid her, I had never noticed the cloth in her hands. I never bothered to look. Never thought to ask her story. And here this woman was knitting a gift for God." From that chance encounter he said, he began to learn her history. Her background. Her story. And yet the priest was reluctant to share his experience with his community despite its almost biblical power and impact.

Many of the holiest moments in life are not found in churches or synagogues or in the cloistered study of sacred literature. No, the sacred moments that sustain and bind us together are the sharing of our common humanity through simple encounter -- the telling and hearing of our stories, the passing along of our experiences, both epic and passing. I imagine our souls being woven out of our memories and stories -- the threads of our lives.

Everyone has a story to tell and deserves to tell it. And the simple acts of inquiry and listening are among the greatest gifts we can offer during this holiday season or any other season. Telling and hearing our stories is a rare instance of a gift given and received in two directions -- at once an act of solidarity and reciprocity. It knits together the fabric of our separate lives into a common tapestry. We are taught at an early age not to talk to strangers, but often we keep people as strangers when we could be building relationships. We build bunkers instead of communities.

By stopping on the sidewalk and asking what the woman was knitting, the priest stepped off the path of indifference and onto the path of encounter. He stopped seeing a prostitute to be ignored and saw the face of person to engage. He awoke from a life of service to rituals and the comfort in his known world to the truth that all life is sacred. And life is made holy when service to God means service to others. And then choosing to live that truth in everyday actions -- small acts of kindness and humanity -- like engaging in a conversation.

Listening to someone's story is a way of showing respect, a way of conveying dignity. At a time of year when many of us will be rushing around doing last minute shopping and some of us will volunteering in shelters, food banks and serving meals, we should step further along the path -- strive toward a deeper connection and ask to hear a bit, or a bit more, of someone's story.

In truth, it doesn't matter if we are hearing a story for the first time shared by a complete stranger or for the thousandth time told by a close relative. Just as some people expect to be heard, listened to -- even obeyed, others are just as accustomed to being ignored, stepped over, forgotten -- even used. And it is not always easy to distinguish one from the other. But the humble shrub and the trembling mountain both hold the voice of God.

This time every year we retell stories of our people. We call them miracles: a baby being born in a manger, or a small group of believers overcoming the odds to survive. The miracle of light in the darkness. When we tell and listen to our stories we knit together the fabrics of our separate journeys onto the tapestry of humanity. And in that way, we not only offer a gift to each other, we offer a gift to God who the tradition says created people because of a love of stories.

 

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07:52 AM on 01/04/2012
The story is emotional humanly speaking which is still nostalgic to the Old Testament concept of Law or doing good. The New Testament speaks of Fulfillment. Its not Anthropocentric as the story is focussed upon but Theocentric.
This is what stories can do. It can appeal to your emotions leaving out discernment to the truth.
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AbrahamSadegh
03:11 AM on 12/26/2011
Thank you Rabbi Berkovitz.

The story of the Priest and the Prostitute and his transformation reminds of the 2000 movie "Chocolat" that received 5 Oscar nominations including the Best Picture and staring Juliette Binoche, Judy Dench, Alfred Molina and Johnny Depp.

It is about the transformation of a small strictly traditional and strictly religious village in France to a loving community as reflected in the opening statement of in this case the Easter Sunday sermon at the local church by also a transformed young and initially strict and rigid minister. He says:

"I'm not sure what the theme of my homily today ought to be. Do I want to speak of the miracle of Our Lord's divine transformation? Not really, no. I don't want to talk about His divinity. I'd rather talk about His humanity.

“I mean, you know, how He lived His life, here on Earth. His ‘kindness’, His ‘tolerance’... Listen, here's what I think.

“I think that we can't go around... measuring our goodness by what we don't do. By what we deny ourselves, what we resist, and who we exclude. I think... we've got to measure goodness by what we ‘embrace’, what we create... and who we include.”
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WilliamL
08:56 PM on 12/25/2011
Considering all that has come to light with the inappropriate sexual behavior/activities of some Priests or Rabbis, activities and behavior which make the life of prostitutes Saintly, there is not a Priest or Rabbi on the planet that has any business looking down on any Prostitutes or those they serve.
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just a voice here
Don't Tread On Me
06:28 PM on 12/25/2011
Two thumbs up!
03:08 PM on 12/25/2011
During my first year of rabbinical school, I jotted down the following thought: Everyone has a story; it will be my job to help those stories get told. Nearly thirteen years later, I understand even more fully the importance of my original belief. Imagine what an amazing thing it would be if we took the time to share our stories with those around us. How much easier it would be to discern the Divine Spark within each one of us.

A beautifully articulated post.
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phal4875
The world is run by cats; we just feed them.
04:18 PM on 12/26/2011
Fanned. Your thoughts, after thirteen years of listening, must be filled with knowledge about others.
05:57 PM on 12/24/2011
Rabbi,

This is a beautiful story and I like your quote from the painter Camille? Pissarro.

Everything is holy.

Kol tuv
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iLdoRight
Encouraging The Rightest Rightness
01:34 PM on 12/24/2011
"Created people because of a love of stories"? That is not what I read in the Holy Scriptures.
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yoyo1900
12:56 PM on 12/24/2011
Thanks Rabbi for your story. It was well written and a lesson for all of us to learn. I always talk to strangers and find that we all have things in common. It is like a common thread that runs between us all.
12:50 PM on 12/24/2011
I read this differently! The priest was judgemental from the start. He disapproved of her profession and he disapproved of others who would visit her. Who is he to judge? A young man who has been taught to disapprove and find his knowledge in a book. He only changes his mind when he finds out the women shares his faith. What if she had been a Protestant or a Jew? I doubt the story would have the same ending. I think it just demonstrates the man changes one prejudice for another.
01:25 PM on 12/24/2011
Yes, the priest in the started out very different and predjudiced. However, he did find a moment of bonding and discovered a real person with a story. I am very sure that Rabbi Berkovitz could have expanded the story of what happened "after," but it is reasonable to consider that the point of the story was that singular and significant moment of discovery underneath the surface of what someone shows the world. As human beings, we need to remember that God sees through the veils and there is always “the rest of the story……”.
02:20 PM on 12/24/2011
"God sees through veils"? I don't agree with that and I still maintain the priest just swapped prejudices.
12:14 PM on 12/24/2011
Shema - hear. Listen, see, hear. God is the Creator of all that is. Thanks, Rabbi.
11:14 AM on 12/24/2011
Beautifully written.

As activity director in a care facility, I use storytelling to engage people into community. Not just stories from the elders, but stories from the staff, too. It is really amazing to watch the transformation from more or less "disengagement" to bonding and caring.