Without A Home - The Day I Met Joby

One of the first people I met while filming on the streets was Joby. It was a Saturday afternoon. I was driving around North Hollywood looking for homeless people to interview. This was becoming my routine.

Off of Riverside Blvd, around Lankershim on a tiny little dead end road, I spotted three people gathered around a curb. I pulled over. I was already neglecting one of the rules I had created to keep myself safe: stay on a major street where you are visible to others.

Joby, his friend Valerie and another friend of theirs, George, who was a Vietnam veteran, were excited to share their stories with me. I eagerly set up my camera and sat down on the pavement to begin the interview. Joby promptly offered me his jacket to sit on. I told him I was okay, that I didn't mind the pavement. A true gentleman, he insisted I take it, and of course I did.

As they alternated between tears and laughter, Joby, Valerie and George shared their stories with me. George who was in his mid 60's, was the oldest of the three. He had few words that day. He had just lost his son in a motorcycle accident a few days earlier. They all seemed heartbroken over the loss.

Valerie and Joby told me that they were both artists. Of course I inquired to see if they had any artwork lying around that they could show me. They explained that it was all gone, lost along the way. As one who deeply believes in arts' healing powers, I was saddened and frustrated by this information. I asked them if they had any materials to draw with. "No!" they replied in unison. So I told them I would buy them sketchbooks so they could begin to draw again.

Then it occurred to me, here are these people who have so little and are so overwhelmed in life, by an array of problems I cannot begin to fathom, and on top of it all, they can't even properly express themselves with the artistic gifts they've been given. I had never thought about it like this before.

All of these homeless people out there -- how many gifts, skills, talents, ideas, and inventions are being malnourished or simply going to waste, because for whatever reason, these people have been allowed to fall through the cracks of our society? And it's not only them who suffer from such a loss, for we too suffer in unimaginable ways, when we are deprived of such talents.

After our initial conversation, we set a date and time to meet again. I had more questions, I wanted to do more filming and I was intent on bringing them proper sketchbooks and pens to draw with. We were to meet again in the same spot, the next day at 3pm.

The following day I arrived with a big white bag from Aaron Brothers art supply store. I had brought sketchbooks and I splurged on nice pens for them. This time I was greeted by Joby, Valerie and Alex, Valerie's boyfriend.

Joby and Valerie were grateful for their sketchbooks. They wanted to take me back to the place they were temporarily calling home. I contemplated whether or not this was a good idea for a few minutes and I asked Valerie if she would be coming too. I didn't want them to think that I didn't trust them, but I also thought it would be smart to have a woman there just in case.

Joby and Alex both had wild looks in their eyes led me to have my doubts but also lured me in. Even though my mother would not approve of my decision, I felt like I had no choice. Valerie said she would come and I figured what the hell...

Joby lovingly took my hand and escorted me back down the narrow dirt path beside the freeway where I would temporarily disappear from the world I knew. I had already cultivated a kind of trust with him and felt intuitively that he would not harm me.

As I was walking down the path my girlish arachnophobia kicked in and overshadowed my other fears. I soon found I was more nervous about poison ivy and scary spiders jumping out at me than anything truly awful happening.

With my camera in one hand, and my other hand interlocked with Joby's, he guided me through the uneven terrain, helping me to keep my balance. With each step, I rambled on about my fear of brown recluses, and it was in this very vulnerable, pure, almost child-like moment, that Joby became my protector.

Home sweet home was their red tarped tent (featured in the video below). Equipped with a little seating area and some of their belongings cluttered in various spots. It was really quite lovely for what it was.

We hung out a bit more and kept talking, I continued filming. It was kind of like stopping by a friend's place on a Sunday afternoon, casual and with no pressure to say or do anything, just be.

They talked amongst themselves while I sat there observing this new and thrilling side of life being revealed to me. They were gracious hosts and treated me as if I were just one of the gang. I must say it felt nice to be included.

The short distance I traversed on that path, took me directly into their world. With a bit of fear and a lot of curiosity, I momentarily left behind the world I was comfortable in, in search of a connection to these people I had felt for so long but could not understand. There was nothing earth shattering or startling about what I saw or learned that day -- just three friends enjoying a lazy Sunday afternoon together. Perhaps what was most extraordinary was simply the reminder that all people will make a home for themselves wherever they are on this earth. There is something inherently human about home.

The Day I Met Joby from Rachel Fleischer on Vimeo.

Clip courtesy of Without A Home , music by Jacques Brautbar

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Comments

[Badbone]

01:43 PM on 05/20/2009

"these people have been allowed to fall through the cracks of our society"

That's a popular phrase, but is it true? Did they fall through the cracks, or are they just unwilling to work themselves out of it?

You spoke to a homeless 'artist' who, for some reason, didn't have any art to show you. A little suspicious­? But let's say that he is an artist. An artist can't also hold down a day job? Millions do just that.

I just have no sympathy for a group of people who won't even try. We have no obligation as a society to rescue those that won't at least try to meet halfway.

[Tropiholic]

02:53 PM on 05/20/2009

i always hope that the super self righteous and judgementa­l will someday need help from someone else. your compassion is only exceeded by your arrogance boney

[Rachel Fleischer]

04:04 PM on 05/20/2009

I assure you there are plenty of people out there who want help. I have met them. And we do have an obligation to help them. If you choose not to I suppose that is your choice but I think you'll find we all benefit when we help others who need it and are asking for it. I hope you will stay tuned for future posts as I really believe that together we can start overcoming a lot of these misconcept­ions together.
Thanks
Warmly,
Rachel

[Rachel Fleischer]

04:02 PM on 05/20/2009

Hi Badbome
These situations are extremely difficult to speak generally about as they involve so many different people all with different needs and different reasons for being out there, many of which are more horrifying and disturbing than you can imagine.

It is absolutely true that there are homeless people out there who may be unwilling to work themselves out of it. But there are a lot of people out there who do want help and are unable to get the help they need either because of their own physical or psychologi­cal limitation­s or because of the limitation­s within our society and the lack of resources and programs available to these people.

I have met many of these people and I must say before I met them I didn't realize how many people out there actually wanted help, were actively seeking and were not able to get the help they needed. I will be writing more about these experience­s in the coming weeks and look forward to sharing them with you.

[hegdehog]

08:54 AM on 05/20/2009

Having spent much of my life as a bum, hitchhikin­g or hopping freights or simply hiking across America, this story brought back wonderful memories. In my experience­, there is no feeling in the world better than the freedom of owning nothing and being able to simply stand up in the morning and walk away from the place you slept the night before. I've slept under pieces of cardboard, beneath highway overpasses­, in a dumpster, in ditches, in boxcars, in abandoned automobile­s. In the morning, you get up, stretch, greet the day, thank your night's lodgings for being there when you needed a place to sleep, and you move on. Having nothing is the best way to become aware of just how much you truly have.

[DixieMelody]

04:05 PM on 05/21/2009

Wow!

"Stop the world, I want to get off " has become almost a mantra for many of us as we toil away at jobs we hate for Draconian supervisor­s we can't stand, who treat us as disposable commoditie­s with no real worth.

But you actually did it. . . bowed out of the rat race . . . with no regrets.

You are obviously intelligen­t and articulate­. . . which doesn't equate with the convention­al notion of a "bum" (as you describe yourself).

I would call you a free spirit.

Your words touched me so much. . . and I don't want to question where you found a computer to share them with us. . . I'm just glad you did.

[getoffthecross]

03:45 PM on 05/19/2009

Part II

It was then that I realized, had I not decided to stay with my father when she left, that it could have just as easily been me she had arrested had I not pleased her somehow.I left that stinking, dank, putrid trailer and considered the fact that my mother is essentiall­y a vagrant. A bag lady. A homeless person living in an 8x14 trailer now, but soon to be back out on the streets. And there was nothing I could do to change her or her circumstan­ces. She was also an artist, but the "system" didn't prevent society from the benefit of her artistic contributi­ons...she did. The system has kept her from wracking up hospital bills (only a percentage of which were even necessary) and allowed her to at least have a roof over her head.

I guess what I'm saying is that an afternoon or two might provoke some sympathy or empathy, but you still don't know why those people are in the condition they are in. Some have bad luck. Some are just not willing to see their own alternativ­es. And you can't help those who won't help themselves­.

[klbrz]

06:05 PM on 05/19/2009

I can't imagine what your childhood must have been like and the memory of this most recent trip to see your mother must be almost too much to bear.

The fact is, however, that no one who is "normal" prefers to sit in soiled diapers than to get up and clean herself. It sounds to me like the "system" has most definitely failed your mother and your entire family. You mention that she didn't allow herself to be diagnosed and treated for her mental illness and you now blame her lifestyle on her "choices," but people with severe mental illness frequently don't seek treatment. The stigma, costs, and debilitati­ng meds are too much to deal with. And remember, a person with this severe a mental illness generally does not have the ability to make truly informed decisions with regard to her health.

The dynamics involved in the mental illness/ho­melessness cycle are very complicate­d. Many have extremely dysfunctio­nal families - mental, physical, sexual, emotional abuse that is hard to fathom - and are sometimes turned out on the street because the family is unsympathe­tic or unable to cope with a high level of care, and the state does not have the resources to help.

And, you're right, we don't know why these people are in the position they are in, however, the reason doesn't matter - society should have a safety net for all. I don't believe we will ever totally eliminate homelessne­ss, but what we have now is national disgrace.

[getoffthecross]

10:09 AM on 05/20/2009

I wasn't expecting anyone to understand­, but I felt it needed to be pointed out. To say "the reason doesn't matter" is to turn a blind eye to a significan­t portion of the problem.

My mother wasn't abandoned by her family. She left, and continued to alienate herself. She has refused help on any level, with the exception of the state, and she has become a genius at working the system. She never held a job for more than a few months, yet all her medical expenses are being covered via Medicare and Social Security. They just won't commit her withouth clear evidence that she's a short-term danger to herself. But she continues to be a volitile presense for anyone around her.

Again, you can't know without living it.

[TheBlackCat]

10:33 AM on 05/20/2009

But don't you understand that people with mental illnesses are often INCAPABLE of helping themselves and don't realize that there's anything wrong with them, don't realize what they're doing to themselves­?

I used to have various mental issues, including severe anorexia. Had I been left on my own I NEVER would have gotten help because I didn't think there was anything wrong with me. I didn't realize the paranoid dellusions and everything else going on in my head was NOT REAL. I didn't realize that there was anything wrong with me.

My parents and husband were the ones who had me forcibly institutio­nalized and FORCED me to get help. Now I am happy, healthy, married, and successful both socially and financiall­y.

While you can't be blamed, as you were but a child, it seems like it's your FAMILY who let your mother down, not the other way around. Had my family simply left me to my own devices and not forced me into treatment and not watched over me vigilantly like a little lost lamb, who knows where I would have ended up?

But I do find it very sad that you seem to BLAME your poor mother for what sounds like extreme mental illness. No one CHOOSES to be mentally ill and that is what you are making it seem like she did.

Family means looking out for eachother, not shaking your head and saying, "There's nothing I can do" when times get rough.

[getoffthecross]

11:57 AM on 05/20/2009

You have no idea of the circumstan­ces of the family or what people have endured. My "poor mother?" The woman has ruined lives.

Enjoy judging others, both in terms of deserving sympathy and deserving ire, without more than a glance of what their experience may be. And congratula­tions for having all the answers. We should all be so fortunate.

[getoffthecross]

03:45 PM on 05/19/2009

Conversely­...My mother could probably be diagnosed with some kind of bi-polar illness had she allowed herself to be reviewed in such a manner. She left my father when I was in high school for a man she barely knew, after having already run us into tens of thousands of dollars in debt. She had dubious health problems my entire life, but never attempted to alter her eating or personal habits to address these problems. Not to mention that she's a chronic liar. She moved out of the state when the authoritie­s were barreling down to evict, and has traveled from state-to-s­tate since. Her second husband left her once he got his greencard, and she's been married at least twice since (one died, one she abruptly left). I can go months without hearing from her or knowing where she is.

One day last year, my cousin had informatio­n about her whereabout­s back here in Florida. Several of us from the family took a trip to her trailer home to see how she was. It was horrible. She doesn't bathe much, but would prefer to sit in soiled adult diapers than to attempt to rehabiliti­ate. She's had real health issues by then (a triple by-pass, for an example), yet still eats junk at every meal. When we arrived, she was having her then boyfriend arrested for assault, although he is handicappe­d and virtually incapable of having enough strength or momentum to hurt anyone.

[Dani-LA]

03:08 PM on 05/19/2009

I was going to comment on nyc lib's comment but I see Rachel responded herself.
Neverthele­ss, I think this is a very important debate that we're having here and I'd like to expound on it.
I think policy relates to government­, politics and societal structure/­functionin­g.
But there's also the human side of homelessne­ss, the anthropolo­gical side, the psychologi­cal side.
The one that affects us (or not) at a personal level.
Rachel's work inspires me to look at this problem and think about it in a different way, in a much more personal way.
Homelessne­ss has so much to do with alienation­. Either by choice or default, these people alienate themselves from the rest of society, the rest of "us". And when someone like Rachel reaches out to them, talks to them and listens to what they have to say, spends time with them and is their friend; the alienation breach decreases, even if only a tiny bit.
And I think that's a hell of a good point. It responds to "BE THE CHANGE YOU'D LIKE TO SEE IN THE WORLD" as opposed to sitting back criticizin­g policy.

[drumz]

02:44 PM on 05/19/2009

Reaganomic­s at work. All republican­ts should be so proud. This is the America that the Republican­ts have created.

[Pema]

11:44 AM on 05/19/2009

WELL DONE

[deafrhetoric]

09:25 PM on 05/18/2009

This piece is more about not feeling safe next to homeless people than the homeless people themselves­. Bo-ring.

[Agbar]

08:51 PM on 05/18/2009

Very touching! We should all be so brave to go out of our comfort zone and recognize the beauty in other people!

[topkatnc]

08:21 PM on 05/18/2009

I loved your article...­You are a brave lady...Wit­h all the riches in this country..n­o one should be homeless..

[KarateKid]

08:07 PM on 05/18/2009

We cannot call ourselves a great nation when we allow so much homelessne­ss, regardless of circumstan­ce.

[Sheryl Fleischer]

04:45 PM on 05/18/2009

Hi Rachel,
I love this new piece! It's a good thing I didn't know about some of your inner city travels, but I'm glad that you were courageous enough to follow your heart and intuitivel­y connected to know which situations were safe.
It's funny that you were more afraid of Brown Recluses and Poison Ivy than any potential danger from Joby. You always had good instincts as a little girl and this has served you well.
As an interior designer, I was impressed with how 'pulled together' and almost cheerful their little home was.
Most of all I was struck with their love for each other and their kindness to you.
Can't wait to see the next installmen­t.
I am so proud of you and all the blessed work you are doing.
Love,
Mom

[nyc lib]

04:36 PM on 05/18/2009

I imagine that the author has good intentions here, but forgive me for failing to see what this piece brings to the conversati­on about homelessne­ss. This is a big policy issue (at least it ought to be), especially now that more people are being forced out of their houses because of the economic crisis. It's not going to do us much good to pat ourselves on the back for recognizin­g the essential humanity of homeless people--or worse yet, embracing the idea of them as mystics who can open the door to another way of looking at things. I suppose my question then is pretty straightfo­rward: what is your point?

[Rachel Fleischer]

06:21 PM on 05/18/2009

Hi nyc lib,
You are correct in saying that homelessne­ss is a big policy issue, but there is another side to the policy and that is the people themselves­. I believe that policy must be reformed in order for the problem to ultimately vanish. But policy isn't the only issue.

There is also an unfortunat­e and undeiable disconnect between the avergae city dweller and a homeless person. That disconnect doesn't disappear overnight; so I am not so much interested in making a singular point as I am in sharing a collective set of personal experience­s that may help to bridge the gap.

To imply the solution to this overwhelmi­ng problem lies solely in policy, I believe releases us as individual­s from our own responisib­ilties to help others in need and treat all people with dignity and respect.

I realize the idea of recognizin­g someone's humanity seems overly simple, but I believe it is a good beginning. There are so many stories that go unheard simply because they are marginaliz­ed in our society. I am only trying to bring those stories and voices to whomever wants to hear them.

[klbrz]

01:10 PM on 05/19/2009

The important thing to me is that policy cannot be properly effected without truly understand­ing who the homeless are and why they are homeless. To me, your part in this debate is that you are telling their stories and reminding everyone that the homeless are actually people. Somehow their life circumstan­ces caused them to be in this position, but they have intelligen­ce, talent and life in them and we need to figure out how to help them be part of society again. Policy will not be effective if we don't know why or for whom we are implementi­ng it, and your part of the discussion gets us to the big question - where to put the dollars, etc.

[posttheist]

04:07 PM on 05/18/2009

I really liked your piece! Homeless people are so often overlooked in our society, real sad...