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It's Called "Poverty," You've Probably Never Heard of It

Posted: 08/03/11 03:04 PM ET

Here's the great thing about Etsy. As repellant as some of the shit is that I find there, there is always something worse.

Today I present one of the most insensitive features I've ever seen on the Etsy blog. And as usual, it's celebrated in a circle jerk of obliviousness, complete with hipstermatic photos and dipshit Etsy drones yammering in approval.

2011-08-02-hoboblowme.jpg

Yes it's a poverty wedding! How fun is that? They dressed like actual poor people! They even did some research:

We got to work researching the Depression era and hobo culture. As we prepared to make everything for our wedding, we collected feed sack dresses and old work boots, antique hand-stitched quilts and jug band instruments. After reading that the word "hobo" may be a syllabic abbreviation of "homeward bound," we fell in love with the notion!

They fell in love with the very idea of penniless, homeless migrants, drifting from town to town, looking for work! Those hobos were just yummy, with their faded antique quilts and feed sacks, and those super cute boots they always wore. That whole period was just so desaturated and Brother Where Art Thou, which is also totes adorbs.

Okay, maybe many hobos found themselves having to leave their families in order to find enough work to support them, or maybe they escaped from harsh lives in orphanages. And, okay, maybe they died on train tracks or sweltered to death in locked box-cars. And maybe when they did finally find some work, they were set upon by thieves who took everything from them and threw them off of fast moving trains.

Don't be such a downer! They had totally awesome trash can fires!

2011-08-02-canfire.jpeg



The important thing is, hobos were all clowns who had bandanas tied on sticks, like in cartoons.

Anyhoo, it was a super cute wedding. But I can't help thinking that they could have done so much more with it.

Here are some ideas you can use when you have your own hobo themed depression era wedding!

• Souvenir photos on a lice ridden mattress in the weeds

• Tuberculosis screening tent

• Steal your own dinner

• Cigarette rolling contest with butts you find on the street

• Sterno martinis

• Hobo Stew bar

I'm sure you can think of lots more. Just remember to have fun with it. Golly, that's why the Flying Spaghetti Monster made poor people in the first place!

 

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