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Rev. Amy Ziettlow

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Treating the Body as a Sacred Home

Posted: 01/20/11 09:11 PM ET

I currently call Louisiana home. Despite my not being a native Cajun, I know to sprinkle file powder in my gumbo, to wear any color but white to a crawfish boil, and to smile with pure joy when someone brings a King Cake.

The season of King Cakes begins with Epiphany on January 6th. An oval-shaped ring of pastry, King Cakes celebrate the journey of the Magi, who traveled from the East to worship the Christ child and who then must relinquish control over their travel plans and return home by another route in order to avoid the murderous King Herod. A small, plastic baby Jesus lies hidden somewhere in the cake for us searchers to find. If you find him, you must bring the next King Cake. The colors for the icing tend to be purple, gold, and green to symbolize the royal colors of the 3 Kings. Heated debates occur over which bakery has the best icing and filling, and somehow your preferences speak volumes about your character. Do you prefer white creamy frosting or a simple glaze of crystalized sugar? Do you stick to a traditional filling or add cream cheese, or fruit, or even chocolate or Zulu filling, which features coconut in honor of the New Orleans Zulu parade where they throw coconuts? For a native, the "best" King cake reminds you of home.

I love them all so I find myself wondering in the swirl of cinnamon, icing, and baby Jesus, how am I supposed to lose weight when I am eating all these cakes!?!?!?

For losing weight is what we are all supposed to be doing right now, right? Most New Year's resolutions reference our bodies, whether the goal is to eat more vegetables, eat less sugar, exercise more, or lose 10 pounds. The dawning of the New Year lifts a mirror to our lives, calling us to reflect upon the ways we are and are not at home in our bodies.

To varying degrees and on varying timelines, most of us fall short of our resolutions concerning total body makeovers. Others of us become obsessed and lose all sense of ourselves and others. Watching the tragic journey of the character Nina Sayers in Black Swan, we see how the pursuit of bodily perfection and control can enchant, isolate, and drive mad an individual who is not at home in her body and who cannot see her existence outside of a mirror. Eventually, the woman in the mirror kills her. As her shame and disgust for her body, for her mortality, and for her very humanity grows, she imagines herself transforming into a swan: feathers, webbed toes, and talons. I use the word "disgust" and "shame" thinking of Martha Nussbaum's reflection in Hiding from Humanity: Disgust, Shame, and the Law, where she concludes profoundly that we ...

"are deeply troubled about being human -- about being highly intelligent and resourceful, on the one hand, but weak and vulnerable, helpless against death, on the other. We are ashamed of this awkward condition and, in manifold ways, we try to hide from it. In the process we develop and teach both shame at human frailty and disgust at the signs of our animality and mortality." (336)

In hospice care, I am surrounded by the inescapable limits of the body that culminate in death: the ultimate limit of our human bodies. I am fascinated by how the words we use to talk about death communicate our disgust with ultimate limits. When I served as a hospital chaplain, staff never used the words death or die. A patient was "discharged" or "expired" or "passed." I find all three terms fairly disgusting, considering they are also words used for bodily functions and fluids from menstruation to ejaculation to flatulence to rotting food. How telling that when our bodies reach the ultimate limit, attaining utter imperfection, we attach shameful, gross words to the event: expired, discharged or passed. Our words reflect our fear and discomfort with the reality that our human home is a body that is vulnerable and limited. Our human home dies.

Day in and day out, hospice team members travel to local homes with the goal of assisting patients to feel at home in their bodies. For many of those we serve, their bodies may feel quite alien, uncomfortable, unwieldy, and painful. As they lose control of basic body functions, such as eating, toileting, bathing and breathing, the body can feel like a burdensome, run-down shack and not the sacred home that it is. I use the word "home" in its best possible connotations: a place of safety and security, of warmth and acceptance, of comfort and deep identity.

For example, Ms. D. died last week and one source of pride was her hair. In her 90-some odd years, she never missed a hair appointment every Friday, and our team was careful to plan their visits to her home accordingly. The nurse and chaplain who attended her death gently prepared her body for the arrival of the funeral home. The chaplain took comb in hand to style her hair. Now, Ms. D. is dead and as far as we know she has no idea what her hair looks like, but in life having perfectly styled hair made her feel at home in her body and thus at home in the world, and so our team attended to her hair.

Through serving in hospice, I have witnessed how every body, whether healthy and vibrant, scarred and fragile, in control or infantile, is sacred, created in the image of the divine, and deserving of the opportunity to feel at home. Like the Magi, who encounter the divine and thus return home by a creative and unexpected route, I see how simple actions such as a touch, a song, a smile, even the gentle styling of hair, can be sacred and send someone home by a different route.

 
I currently call Louisiana home. Despite my not being a native Cajun, I know to sprinkle file powder in my gumbo, to wear any color but white to a crawfish boil, and to smile with pure joy when someon...
I currently call Louisiana home. Despite my not being a native Cajun, I know to sprinkle file powder in my gumbo, to wear any color but white to a crawfish boil, and to smile with pure joy when someon...
 
 
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10:03 PM on 01/23/2011
I can't finish this article until I get this off my chest: PLEASE put in a "Spoiler Alert" notice when you write about a movie that some of us have yet to see!!!!
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06:20 PM on 01/22/2011
'You should treat your body as a temple.'
'I Do. I desecrate it!'
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HUFFPOST COMMUNITY MODERATOR
Weirdwriter
01:15 AM on 01/23/2011
So long as it's your own temple, who cares.
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playflute2
flootz
04:05 PM on 01/23/2011
I think that is very sad.
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Lou Kavar
get to know me at www.loukavar.com
04:55 PM on 01/22/2011
After I was ordained (thirty years ago), I served as chaplain at a large inner city hospital. After five years there, I began working with people with AIDS, which I did for another ten years. Working with the seriously ill and those making the transition from this life impacted my life in significant ways. While it's not uncommon to think of the body as a possession -- as the shell holding the person -- in fact all we know and experience is in and through our bodies. It's through our bodies that we know love, care, hope, and, yes, sadness.
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Punks
03:48 PM on 01/22/2011
Beautiful piece. Especially the last paragraph.

And hospice is such a wonderful service. I totally appreciate it.

As to life beyond death. Of course. No matter the limits of science to prove or agree.
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alterego55
Flash your citations or leave!
01:29 PM on 01/22/2011
Long after we are "declared" dead, there are pockets of cells huddled together struggling to construct the last molecules of ATP - not only the various cells in our bodies, but also the colonies of symbiotic organisms we have hosted our entire lives. Only when every last cell has ceased in its following its prime directive, can a body truly be called lifeless. Oh wait, then whole new colonies of life benefit from our existence.
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Weirdwriter
03:17 PM on 01/22/2011
Excellent post, and not incompatible with the point of the opinion piece. Fav'd.
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Monday Morning
“Try and fail, but don't fail to try.
12:21 PM on 01/22/2011
Wonderful article, thank you for reminding us that death is nothing to fear...a continuous journey from one place to another! The dead need to be treated with dignity and respect anything less is just offensive and should be unacceptable!
12:12 PM on 01/22/2011
This is a heartbreakingly beautiful article. For 10 years I was a massage therapist who specialized in working with pregnant women, babies and the elderly. It was a great joy and blessing in my life to give ease and comfort to these people as they came into and passed out of life, into and out of the sacred vessel of the body. My home is hung with Alex Grey's art, and as a Buddhist I meditate daily on the impermanence of the body and all things. Thank you for bringing this perspective to the Christian practice of love and service to those in need, and hats off to you for your beautiful metaphor of the King Cake and Epiphany—my husband’s family are all Cajuns and we are preparing to make our own homemade cake for Mardi Gras here in the Rockies (though I must say Whole Foods does a pretty great King Cake if you’re short on time). For one of the most beautiful songs about old age and dying that you will ever hear, listen to Stuart Davis's song "Swim" on iTunes. I will be following your blogs, thanks again for such a beautiful piece.
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Thisbeautifulplanet
omnia vincit amor
02:09 PM on 01/22/2011
This is a great, truly inspiring post that actually set me thinking as deeply as the article above. I have a high opinion of people who care so much for their fellow men that they devote time to giving them love and comfort. Thank you for walking in the light and getting us to tread on the same path. Your example sets the bar very high in terms of generosity and spirituality.

I am glad I fanned you and regret that I cannot do it twice. Here (I am a Norman) we celebrated King's Day on January 2 as family. I wish you the best.
01:46 PM on 01/24/2011
Back at you! :-)
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Rev. Amy Ziettlow
08:57 AM on 01/24/2011
Thanks for the wonderful recommendation of the Stuart Davis song. What amazing imagery--falling into the ocean and the ways that we are buoyed to swim. Beautiful. The imagery he paints at the beginning of the hospitals and the cold metal, chilling.
On a totally different note, I had my first King Cake from Whole Foods last Friday and it was tasty. However, they included a bean with the cake and you were supposed to hide the bean. I have never heard of that tradition!
01:45 PM on 01/24/2011
Thank you! I think the WF bean tradition has arisen from the era of frivolous lawsuits. Although it may also be a revival of an old tradition--the French name for the small "babies" placed in the King Cake is "santons feves"--"feve" means fava bean so that was probably used at some point in history, especially by poorer families. The antique charms are made of porcelain or metal and would definitely crack a tooth or cause some problems if swallowed!

So glad you liked Stu's song. "Guardians" is also a beautiful song for his parents--I have gifted that, another song "Invincible" and "Swim" to friends and the families of my elderly clients when their dear ones pass away. Bright Apocalypse is an album of devotional songs I often give as well. Stuart's music has comforted, inspired and entertained me for many years and I love to share the love! :-)
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playflute2
flootz
10:11 AM on 01/22/2011
Thanks for a beautiful article. And blessings on all Hospice workers. Hospice was with my Mom and me the last 9 months of her life and were wonderful. I may not have always agreed with her nurse, but I always knew she had mother's best interests at heart. And my Mom didn't pass, go home, etc. She died, peacefully and in her own way at the age of 95 after living a full and interesting life.
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07:01 AM on 01/22/2011
Many wise men and poet's have said this in the past: "Do not mourn over my body, for it is just my shell, for I am in heaven with my father." In my country's, the native's would wait to name their children, in the hope to find which ancestor of their's returned, or as we say in this country, being 'Born Again.' In some culture's they celebrate a death, chearing them on like they just won the race, as well as they should. Our body truely is a temple that holds our soul, as we journey threw this life. With out our body, we could not make this journey.
06:07 PM on 01/21/2011
"I have witnessed how every body, whether healthy and vibrant, scarred and fragile, in control or infantile, is sacred, created in the image of the divine"

What in the world could that possibly mean? Doesn't the Christian concept (if you can call it that) of "god" involve it being infinite and eternal and immaterial? Last time I checked, we are none of those things.
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colred
10:35 AM on 01/22/2011
God is love and love is immortal.
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Weirdwriter
03:19 PM on 01/22/2011
The image of the Divine is love.
06:58 PM on 01/22/2011
Okay, but what does it mean to "be" love? How is one an emotion as opposed to experiencing one? And if something is indeed love, then why not just call it love and leave it at that?
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American Air
01:56 PM on 01/21/2011
Treating your body as sacred is anti christian.
12:29 PM on 01/22/2011
Not true. It says in the Bible that the body is the temple of the spirit.
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HUFFPOST COMMUNITY MODERATOR
Weirdwriter
03:20 PM on 01/22/2011
Actually, that is a gnostic concept that influenced some early Christians who were drawn to the asceticism of denying the material world in favor of the solely spiritual.
01:44 PM on 01/21/2011
in america and canada death has been giving over to capitalism to manage for a profit . clergy i discovered are not involved in funeral "home' management and protocol at cemetaries

" they love music ' the nurse said at the Continuing Care [end station]
wing at the hospital
about the dying

bring flowers oodles and play some favorite music and preferrably bring the person home [ if there's no legal liability or even if there is about it] to die

for last rites also sing sing sing

at the funarel i asked the clergy ,does the christian church have a theology about cremation ? silence

before the gates of the cemetary everyone get out of the cars and walk behind the coffin or vase drawn by horses

funeral houses are an abomination; scientifically and theologically;

honor the body before death ' let the dead take care of the dead "

the highest honor of the human body in life and living is in the ancient knowledge of maharishi [updated or rectified] AYUR VEDA

according to Vedic science, as i understand it , not just jesus is ' verbum caro factum est ' but evry person is the word made flesh . each in their own way is VEDA

Christ of course most completely so

"...of the Veda inside the body..." : the maharishi, at a weeekly press conference between 2002 and 2006 :" ... Transcendental meditation(TM) is a panacea ..."
11:28 AM on 01/21/2011
If you understand alittle about DNA you'll realize that each cell has a memory that reaches back in time.There is an unbroken line of life that goes back to the beginning. The fire of life is in our body and it has been immortal until your body dies. What we now call "junk DNA" has the memory of every body it has been in.
06:09 PM on 01/21/2011
DNA is pretty cool, but what you're proposing is just pseudoscience.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Body_memory#Cellular_memory
12:29 PM on 01/22/2011
I'm not saying that memory is the memory of EVERYTHING that happened to that body.
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littlefairy
One little fairy against the world
11:03 AM on 01/21/2011
I remember reading a short story in Spanish when I was in college, "Cinco Horas con Mario" (Five Hours with Mario) about a woman whose husband has died. She sits with him--his body--for five hours, lovingly touching him and talking to him about their life. It deeply affected how I think about the body in death. I do not believe that the person is any longer IN the body, but that body is how we knew one another, and so, deserves the same love and care as before death--as is shown by this lovely article reminding us of our physical worth. Cindbird, thank you, too, for this reminder. In our youth and perfection obsessed culture, it is all too easy to compare myself to younger, (read: more collagen) women and feel a failure. It's good to remember we do not ALL focus on the exterior.
10:03 AM on 01/21/2011
Well expressed and appreciated.