Stripped! How Paris Hilton Caused the Second Great Depression

There is certainly no shortage of finger pointing to go around for the current global economic crisis. But after exhaustive research and contemplation, I have determined that the majority of blame lay squarely at the Manolo Blahnik adorned feet of only one person: Paris Hilton.

By now we all are well aware of what launched Ms. Hilton's career - she built one of the world's most successful hotel conglomerates. Oh, my mistake, that was someone in her gene pool. Not to say that hotels didn't have a great deal to do with her success - they did - only in 20 minute increments. Did she strive with boundless ambition? No, she struggled in bounded contortion. With a helping hand from YouTube and locker rooms full of post-pubescent boys - Paris suddenly became famous.

Paris Hilton has achieved global iconic status without ever having accomplished anything. She taught us all that that it is ok, even fashionable, to have success without substance, to live well beyond our accomplishments, and that the perception of success was more important that having ever earned it.

Paris Hilton's designer garments fell to the floor, and with them the personal responsibility and accountability of an entire generation!

Not surprisingly, Ms. Hilton's yoga inspired trist soon led to a wave of dramatic societal changes. To keep up with the Jones', we bought McMansions with zero interest loans. We leased BMWs with no money down. We sucked dry home equity lines of credit well beyond what our homes were worth. (turned out the Jones' were broke too...)

We stopped saving altogether, and increased our spending annually to an average of 5% MORE than what we earned.

CEOs took out millions in options and bonuses, often in amounts exceeding the profits of their entire companies. States created entitlements they could never sustain. And the federal government began writing checks that will bounce for generations to come.

Could any of these changes have occurred absent the influence of Paris Hilton? Perhaps. But all occurring simultaneously? That is just too much coincidence for this observer to believe.

Success without substance.

As Warren Buffet once stated, "Only when the tide goes out do you discover who has been swimming naked." The economic tide will likely continue to wash out over the next 12-18 months, and with it the false perceived success of all those living beyond their means. In they end, millions will be lined up on the beach completely exposed, standing alongside Paris Hilton, and all wearing the Empress's New Clothes.

Comments

[wayoutleft]

first of all: had you kept up with paris instead of getting distracted by the election and the tanking market, you would know that paris would be wearing her own line of shoes that's just taking off.

http://www.popcrunch.com/paris-hilton-shoe-line-photos-paris-hilton-footwear-collection-launch-macys-south-coast-plaza/

does this look like someone begging barney frank for a few hundred billion? does this look like a car exec to you?! I think not!! unlike the harvard endowment fund, there is nothing subprime about paris.

[BillZBubb]

"Success without substance."

Substitute George W. Bush for Paris Hilton in your piece and you are on to something.

[Oxonian2001]

Yes! It's no coincidence that both surfaced at roughly the same time. Paris, Nicole, and George W are all spawn of rich, famous men.

And we wonder why America has a problem with entitlement.

[LMPE]

Paris Hilton has never done anything that merits any kind of recognition. Cult star Bruce Campbell (of the "Evil Dead" movies) probably isn't known to everyone, but he clearly achieved his fame by DOING something. Ditto little known actresses Connie Hines and Dorothy Provine.

[Oxonian2001]

If ther's anyone to blame, it's the MSM. They're the ones who've been feeding Paris to the people. They're the ones guilty of dumbing down journalism and reporting.

And it's not just frivolous gossip magazines like US, People, and TV infotainment, but even "respectable" papers like the NYT which have become so disgustingly materialistic over the last decade that I almost refuse to read them. They don't focus as much on Paris Hilton, of course, but rather on older well-to-do women; the NYT and its ilk make it appear as tho' absolutely de rigueur to own several $5,000 purses, $700 shoes and a stash of J CREW/Ralph Lauren sweaters in every color of the rainbow. The idea of featuring who's wearing what only puts us back in the mindless hierarchy of the 19th century. The same goes for the houses featured. How often does the NYT ever show houses or more accurately speaking mansions of less than 5,000 sq. ft costing several million? Why do we need to know about what's "hot" in Greenwich, Westchester, the Hamptons--as if those were the only places that mattered on the East Coast? As such, who can blame CEOs, Wall Streeters, and other upper and upper-middles for demanding higher salaries and/or taking out more loans?

Let's stop this mindless MSM coverage of the wealthy and their goods: maybe then can we emerge out of impending national bankruptcy.

[BackatU]

Actually Paris is one of the few who has been living within her means. She's been scrambling around working at everything under the sun while other's have been playing with their smoke and mirrors. In this she actually a good role model.

[raleigh gent]

Paris Hilton? Is she financially irresponsible?
Is she laying off employees?
Is she causing people to lose money?
Is she engaging in illegal economic practices?
Is she bad for the economy?
Lame choice of scapegoats.