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April, 29, 2007 News Update

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Congress passes Iraq war funding bill with timeline for troop withdrawals. President Bush promises veto. 99 more American soldiers killed in Iraq during April.

VP Cheney says Democrats acting in "blind opposition" to Bush policy. Nothing blind about it. They just had their eyes opened by the voting public.

Former CIA Director George Tenet rips Bush Administration over Iraq War. Does this mean he has to give back the Presidential Medal of Freedom?

Rudy Giuliani says America will be safer if a Republican is elected President in 2008. Yo, Rudy, was America safer on Nov. 11 with a Republican President?

Bush says he has more confidence in AG Alberto Gonzalez than ever before after watching him testify before Senate. No surprise. Only Bush himself and VP Cheney are better at lying in public. Besides, Gonzalez is the only top Administration official who can lie in two languages.

Hillary Clinton says the country is ready for a "multilingual President." Considering the current occupant of the White House, the country is ready for a unilingual President.

Democratic Presidential candidates hold first debate. Former Alaska Governor Mike Gravel included. Gravel? Next thing you know, Al Sharpton will say he's running for President.

Don Imus' producer denounces Sharpton as "sanctimonious skunk." But what does he really think of him?

Sen. John McCain formally announces he's running for President. So what the hell has he been doing for the past two years?

Overcrowded field, some don't belong, some don't have enough money, more hype every day. Presidential race? Nope, Kentucky Derby Week.

Rosie O'Donnell leaving The View. Guess she won't be going to The Apprentice.

Research study shows viewers of The Daily Show know more about current affairs than viewers of Fox News. Hell, viewers of The Daily Show know more about current affairs than the anchors on Fox News.

Subprime lending market tanks. Well what do you expect if you lend money to a bunch of deadbeats?

Alec Baldwin consults with Dr. Phil after nasty e-mail message left on answering machine for daughter is made public. Dr. Phil? Now you know he's really got problems.