Aug. 24, 2009, News Update

President Obama goes on vacation on Martha's Vineyard. Did health care reform go with him? Why doesn't anybody know why it's called Martha's Vineyard?

White House floats trial balloon suggesting public option need not be included. The terrorists have won.

Another balloon indicates White House may proceed on health care reform without Republican support. Finally. If you have the numbers, use'm. That's what the election was about.

Besides, it's about time you recognized that Republicans wouldn't support Obama's health care reform even if it included a cure for cancer.

Defending the "public option" against charges it will drive private companies out of business, Obama points out that FedEx and UPS are doing fine, while the US Post Office is always having problems.
Oops.

Scotland releases Libyan terrorist who blew up Pan Am flight 103, killing 270 people, on "compassionate" grounds since he's dying of cancer. What ever happened to the concept of "rotting in prison"? And what about "compassion" for families of the victims? If I drank Scotch, I'd stop drinking it.

Terrorist given hero's welcome when he arrives in Libya. Another PR coup for Islam and the Arab World.

Would-be presidential assassin Squeaky Fromme paroled after 34 years in prison despite life sentence. "Compassion" not mentioned. Guess Parole Board decided she's no longer threat to President Ford. Will she now visit her hero Charles Manson in jail?

Phil Angelides named to head commission investigating causes of US financial crisis. Angelides? Wasn't he California State Treasurer? The California that's billions of dollars in debt? Maybe investigations, like charity, should begin at home.

Faux News graphic shows price of US stamps has doubled since 1991-from 29 cents to 44 cents. They Report, You Count.

LA Times television page lists showing of "Jackass" on MSNBC in time slot for Keith Olbermann. Has LA Times been taken over by Bill O'Reilly?

News from the penile front: Cindy Adams cites men's room source as saying Alex Rodriguez does indeed have an "A" Rod. Bernie Madoff's former mistress says he has a teeny-weeny. But he still managed to have a long affair with her.....first screwed her and then screwed her out of her savings.

Ruth Madoff decides she's not going to wait 150 years for Bernie to get out.

Bollywood star Shah Rukh Khan detained at Newark airport after name comes up on computer alert list. Khan in US to promote new movie, "My Name Is Kahn," about racial profiling. Thanks, US Customs, for all the free publicity.

CNN introduces new feature called "Just Sayin.'" Fox Noise counters with feature called "Just Kiddin.'"

"Cash for Clunkers" program ends. Minnesota Vikings get in just before the deadline, sign Brett Favre.