Feb. 14, 2011, News Update

02/14/2011 04:42 pm ET | Updated May 25, 2011

Egyptian President Hosni Mubarak steps down after saying in speech he would remain in office until September, despite massive protests against him. Guess Egyptian military made him an offer he couldn't refuse.

Military apparently determined he had stolen enough during 30 years in power and didn't need a few more months to steal more.

People of Egypt claim they've been gypped enough, demand return of ill-gotten gains. Wait 'til they find out his funds invested in Israel.

In his speech, Mubarak said "will of Egyptian people will not be broken." At least he got something right.

He also said he will die in Egypt. Protesters would be happy to accommodate him sooner rather than later.

Jubilation in Cairo after resignation announcement best feel-good story of century so far. On a par with fall of Berlin Wall for sheer exuberance.

NYC newspaper headlines: NY Daily News: "That's A Wrap" (accompanied by picture of Mummy with Mubarak's head). NY Post: "Hosni Mu Bye-Bye." NY Times: "Mubarak Out." You can always count on Times to be catchy.

Egyptian "people" now considered lock to be Time Magazine's Person of the Year (if they remember by then).

CBS "Face The Nation" includes well-known Egyptian expert Sen. John McCain as guest on its program about events in Egypt. How's that for some imaginative programming?

Massive protests taking place elsewhere to topple entrenched leader -- in Italy! Women all over country demonstrate against "sexist" Prime Minister Silvio Berlusconi, who's accused of paying for sex with 17-year old Moroccan dancer. Italian military not likely to intervene.
Berlusconi claims effort to put him on trial over sex scandal offends "dignity of the country." And who better to defend Italy's dignity than a leader embroiled in a sex scandal?

New Republican majority in House makes new restrictions on abortion top priority, wastes lots of time debating so-called wasteful regulations on business, tries to repeal Health Care Reform. So whatever happened to jobs?

Former Defense Secretary Donald Rumsfeld writes memoir entitled "Known and Unknown." How about Untrue? Or Stuff Happens? As Oscar Wilde wrote, "The one duty we owe to history is to re-write it."

After Rumsfeld's memoir and George W. Bush's book, we await Dick Cheney's memoir to complete the Axis of Evil.

Orgy of events celebrates Centennial of Ronald Reagan's birth. Conservatives have nothing else to celebrate so they keep coming back to Reagan. What next, legislation to put him on Mount Rushmore?

All that celebration money might have better been spent on Alzheimer's research.
Reagan's son Ron writes in new book that his father was probably suffering from Alzheimer's while in White House. No surprise to anyone who read CBS correspondent Lesley Stahl's memoir. But why didn't she report it at the time?

Royal Dutch Shell reports $18Billion plus in profits for 2010. Tell me again why your tax dollars are going for subsidies for Big Oil....And tell me why the price of gasoline is hovering around $3.50/gallon despite lagging economy.

And while you're still in a telling mood, tell me why American corporations aren't hiring after racking up record profits in the 3rd quarter of 2010. And why aren't banks lending after once again making huge profits? Sorry, Gordon Gekko, but Greed is not good.

Switzerland votes to allow citizens to keep army-issued weapons at home instead of in armory. Bet you didn't know the NRA has branches in Zurich and Bern.

New study reports college students don't learn much in first two years of college. No mention of "student-athletes" who tend not to learn anything in four years of college.