May 12, 2008, News Update

John McCain denies report he didn't vote for George W. Bush in 2000. Bush says he wasn't bothered by report-he didn't vote for McCain in 2000.

Daughter Jenna gets married. White House outsources wedding to Crawford, Texas.

McCain opposes Fair Pay Act, which gives women equal pay for equal work, says women should get more "education and training." At least he didn't recommend a sex change operation.

Ten more American soldiers killed in Iraq so far this month. Anybody paying attention?

Hillary Clinton still running for President. Anybody paying attention?

Columnist Bob Novak, aka NoFacts, writes that Michelle Obama nixed Hillary as possible VP on Obama ticket. Obama spokesman says column should be set aside in case of "toilet paper emergency." That's an insult to toilet paper.

Obama hints at offer to help Hillary pay off $25million in campaign debts. Hell, Barack, that's just a few Bill speeches.

Obama-and economists-ridicule suggestion by Clinton and McCain that gasoline tax be suspended for summer driving period. How about a $1 a gallon tax on the most wasteful use of fuel---fuel for private jets? If they can afford a private jet, they can afford a gas tax.

Myanmar leaders obstruct foreign aid for cyclone-devastated country, but Prime Minister gives out 20 TV sets and 10 DVD players to victims. Let them eat video.

NY Congressman Vito Fossella arrested for drunk driving, then admits to extramarital affair and fathering a child with girlfriend. He's only Republican member of New York City congressional delegation-but not for long.

US terrorist watch-list includes Nelson Mandela. At least we know where he is.

Delayed election "results" in Zimbabwe show President Mugabe did not lose, but will be in a run-off. Wanna bet on who wins that?

AOL publishes list of 10 worst places to visit. Number one? Baghdad. Such useful information.