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Oct. 27, 2008, News Update

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OCT. 27, 2008, NEWS UPDATE

Presidential campaign enters final week. Hallelujah! Whoever wins,
we'll already be tired of them by Inauguration Day.

Michelle Bachmann, Republican congresswoman from Minnesota, says she's
"very concerned" that Obama may have "anti-American views." Obscure opponent Elwyn Tinklenberg immediately gets nearly $1million in campaign donations. Other Democratic candidates trying to figure out how to get Bachmann to attack them.

Latest anti-Obama slur: He didn't go to Hawaii to visit ailing grandmother, but to destroy evidence showing he's not an American citizen. That's in addition to being accused of palling around with terrorists, being a Muslim, sharing inflammatory views of loud-mouthed preacher, teaching sex to kindergarden kids, wanting to lose in Iraq. Republicans have only one week left to raise suspicions he's a child molester.

Sarah Palin says Vice President runs the Senate. Her confusion is understandable since Vice President currently runs the White House.

With global recession looming, wars raging in two countries and stock market tanking, media focus on how much Republican National Committee spent on clothes for Palin (approximately $150,000). So how much does Tina Fey spend on her clothes? And whatever happened to that good old Republican "cloth coat" that Pat Nixon wore?

Why doesn't anybody want to know how much Joe Biden's hair plugs cost?

Biden says if Obama elected, he'll be faced with international crisis within six months. Joe--First rule of running mate: Do no harm.

Palin drops puck at St. Louis hockey game. She'd already dropped the ball.

Federal government placed beluga whales that live in Cook Inlet in Alaska on endangered species list, despite opposition from Palin. Well, Sarah, there goes the whale vote.

Colin Powell endorses Obama. Should help him with the black vote.

Political ads in North Carolina urge election of Republican congressional candidates so Democrats won't control both White House and Congress. Republican Sen. Gordon Smith of Oregon is trying to link his re-election campaign to Obama, not McCain. But McCain says on stump he's right where he wants to be. Meaning he really wants to go right back to the Senate?

Alan Greenspan, testifying before Congress about his role in credit crisis, says he has detected a "flaw" in his free-market philosophy. Now he tells us. Former Fed chief now known as Greenspun. Guess no Nobel for Economics in the works.

What did you want to be when you grew up? Fireman, nurse, railroad engineer, teacher? Whatever, you're now a banker, courtesy of the Federal government's massive bailout of banks. And your first act of ownership will be to allow the banks to award hundreds of million dollars in bonuses to their executives. Why not just give them fancier titles?

International Monetary Fund will not fire its managing director for having a sexual affair with a subordinate. Take that Paul Wolfowitz. Gives new meaning to the "F" in IMF.