THE BLOG

Michele Bachmann and the Burning Question

04/22/2015 05:14 pm ET | Updated Jun 22, 2015

Well, at least we have a better idea now why Michele Bachmann left Congress. It appears to be because she was training for the pulpit. "We in our lifetimes potentially could see Jesus Christ returning to earth and the Rapture of the church," the Most Reverend Ms. Bachmann said during a radio interview, or sermon, or whatever it was exactly. "We see the destruction, but this was a destruction that was foretold."

And who precisely is the cause of the coming Armageddon? Oh, tosh, c'mon, folks, seriously now, who do you think?

"We are literally watching, month by month, the speed move up to a level we've never seen before with these events. Barack Obama is intent," she intoned. "It is his number one goal to ensure that Iran has a nuclear weapon."

Of course, it's Barack Obama's fault. For a guy who was only a community organizer, he's certainly got a whole lot of power. At least now, though, we know why so many on the radical Religious Right most likely consider him "the Dark Lord." The only thing I don't understand is why that hasn't become an open talking point in the conservative media and House floor. After all, the Truth Shall Set Them Free.

By the way, it will not likely shock you to know that the name of the radio show Ms. Bachmann was on is End Times. So, perhaps this was nothing more than knowing her audience. Or really just a case of -- literally -- preaching to the choir.

In case her finger pointing wasn't clear, though, Ms. Bachmann made her point as blunt as she could from her bully pulpit.

"Any nation that accepts God and his principles is blessed, and those who push away are cursed," she spaketh. "That's what we're seeing happen to the United States. We will suffer the consequences as a result."

Now, obviously, one could refute all this with fact and logic, including that things are really all that bad if the nation was actually crumbling. After all, unemployment is down, the budget deficit is down, new jobs are up, health coverage is up, Israel is actually our strong ally in the Middle East, and the very point of the negotiations with Iran is to block them from having nuclear arms and creating a peaceful resolution, rather than push all nations into a cataclysmic war. One would think that that latter is more in line with the Prince of Peace's thinking, but then fact and logic have little place in the kind of sermon Ms. Bachmann and her minions prefer to spew.

Instead, though, rather than dive into a fruitless debate, I prefer to ponder a simple, basic question about what the radical Religious Right have been trying to pawn off about what Ms. Bachmann reminded us: Jesus Christ pushing away the faithless and cursing those nations who don't accept Him as their Savior.

Which raises the question:

If what she and they are saying is true, that Jesus will annihilate any nation who forsakes Him -- why then hasn't He wiped Iran off the face of the earth already? As well as Iraq, and Syria, and Afghanistan? And for that matter, all the Middle East...including Israel, since they certainly don't even remotely follow the teachings of Jesus Christ. That's almost the very point why there is an Israel.

And we haven't even gotten to China and Russia.

For that matter, I'm hard-pressed to think of any nation in the world who, as a nation, makes it law that all its citizens must follow the teachings of the Christian religion and adhere to the New Testament, rather than a secular constitution. The closest I can come is the Vatican, and they aren't really "a nation" in the United Nations kind of way we think of countries. So, why put all the blame on the United States for its heathenism, let alone lay it at the poor feet of President Obama? None of the world is the way the radical Religious Right wants it to be. Which, alas, may be what bothers them so much.

To be clear, this isn't a debate here about whether the United States is "A Christian Nation" (tm). Since it's nowhere in the Constitution, which is the basis of all law in the country, after all, and therefore remains a debating point solely in the minds of the Believers, who prefer to ignore the First Amendment -- which one would think is hard to miss, being first and all -- we'll leave that for radio shows like End Times to discuss among themselves.

Instead, we'll just return to my original question. If what Michele Bachman is preaching in her sermon and other like-believers insist, that Jesus Christ will curse and destroy all nations who don't accept His principles as law -- why does the entire Middle East still exist? What is Jesus waiting for? They haven't followed His teachings there for the 2,000 years since He was born. He's certainly had more than enough time to catch on.and make up His mind. He couldn't have missed the Crusades or Inquisition. They were in all the papers.

But then, maybe He has made up his mind. Maybe Jesus Christ knows precisely what is going on in the world -- that's a pretty fair bet, and most especially a certainty to those on the radical Religious Right -- and He has made up His mind. And what He decided is that He's okay with it. Live and let live. We are all our brothers keepers, and sisters. And whatever a person believes about God is between that person and...well, God. And everyone else should just butt out and mind their own business, and not pretend to play God.

Besides, if God had wanted mankind to listen to Michele Bachmann, He'd have made her president.

Not a guest on End Times.

*

To read more from Robert J. Elisberg about this or many other matters both large and tidbit small, see Elisberg Industries.