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Robert J. Elisberg

Robert J. Elisberg

Posted: November 24, 2009 10:36 AM

Sarah, Plain and Small

What's Your Reaction:

It never ceases to bemuse me when I see people raving about Sarah Palin as their beloved choice for President of the United States. Mayor! Governor! Maverick! It is a response that speaks volumes, not about Ms. Palin, but about her disciples. And what it speaks is not flattering.

Anyone who supports Sarah Palin for President of the United States is blindly and shamelessly willing to overlook reality. It isn't that Sarah Palin is not remotely qualified by any conception of the human thought process to be president (she's not), it's that she has no place even at the table for discussion.

While I hear woeful cries of vitriol, let me explain. It's pretty basic -- and clear-cut. Here is the starting point of her experience:

1) When Sarah Palin was elected mayor of Wasilla for the first time, she got 616 votes.

2) Sarah Palin served half a term as governor, and then quit.

3) To support her foreign policy credentials, she said, quote, "You can actually see Russia from land here."

And that's just for starters. The list describing how egregiously unqualified she is to be president is extensive. For instance, just consider for a moment that -

Wait a second, no. Don't consider anything else. Stop right there. To consider anything else gives credence that she should be considered. And that unacceptably overlooks those first three points. These three cut you off at the entrance gate. Think of it like trying to get on a ride at a carnival where there's a sign, "Must be tall enough to reach this bar in order to be permitted on rollercoaster."

You have to reach the bar, just to get on.

We are talking about being President of the United States. Commander in Chief of the American Armed Forces. Leader of the Free World. Most power person in the world. And what are Sarah Palin's qualifications?

1) When Sarah Palin was elected mayor of Wasilla for the first time, she got 616 votes.

2) Sarah Palin served half a term as governor, and then quit.

3) To support her foreign policy credentials, she said, quote, "You can actually see Russian from land here."

That can't be said enough. And it can't be said loud enough. Those are the core foundation of Sarah Palin's political experience -- whatever she decides to run for.

You can't get past that. It's reality.

No matter how much one lauds her qualifications for being "a mayor" -- she got 616 votes when she first was elected. You'd get that many votes if you ran for the board of the Rotary Club. And you'd probably end up with more experience.

No matter how much one lauds Sarah Palin's qualifications for being a governor, she only made it to the half-way point. How dismal is this? Name the last governor you know of -- ever -- who quit. At any time. Out of the blue, unprompted. Other than being appointed to a higher job...or indicted. Just quit. One can put whatever desperate, phony spin one wants to on it, but Sarah Palin quit the job swore she would uphold. Yet forget how gallingly irresponsible it is -- the point we're talking about is experience. Sarah Palin has only a half term's experience as governor.

No matter how much one lauds Sarah Palin's qualifications for foreign pol... well, okay, the best even she herself could come up with when asked on ABC was that Alaska was neighbors with Russia, and you could see it from land there. It was the best she could come up with because she has zero foreign policy experience. Zippo. None. Nada. It's hard to suggest that you should be the most powerful person in the world, when your world is the size of a soap box.

It can't be said enough:

1) When Sarah Palin was elected mayor of Wasilla for the first time, she got 616 votes.

2) Sarah Palin served half a term as governor, and then quit.

3) To support her foreign policy credentials, she said, quote, "You can actually see Russia from land here."

Yes, yes, her most ardent, wide-eyed acolytes like to ignore her woeful lacking and instead shout that they "like what she stands for." I would suggest that few of these folks could even begin to tell you what she stands for. At best, you might get soporific platitudes - "She's for conservative values. She's supports the Real America. She's mavericky. She's loves God."

Swell. Except I mean, they can't say what she actually stands for. How would she end the Iraq War? What would she do about Afghanistan? How would she resolve the economic crisis and housing crash? What would she propose as a health care plan? How would she deal with education, the environment, Gitmo, free trade. What's her policy on Israel? Venezuela? The European Union? Russia? Should Levy be invited for Thanksgiving?

By the way, this was a trick question. Her supporters can't explain what she stands for because Sarah Palin doesn't stand for anything. Other than Sarah Palin.

Hey, y'know, I like what my friend Charlie Bondurant stands for. But I wouldn't vote for him to be president. Because he has nothing. And neither does Sarah Palin. As Gertrude Stein described the bleak, emptiness of Oakland, there's no "there" there. Just a void.

1) When Sarah Palin was elected mayor of Wasilla for the first time, she got 616 votes.

2) Sarah Palin served half a term as governor, and then quit.

3) To support her foreign policy credentials, she said, quote, "You can actually see Russia from land here."

That's Sarah Palin.

And it is meaningless to even address her other failures - or anything else about her - because it only serves to distract from this real issue. There is no reason to go further. That's what Sarah Palin's experience is, and what her credentials are. That's where all discussion must begin. And most importantly, end.

If you can't get past the entrance exam, nothing else matters.


UPDATED: Corrected for quote attribution