A Letter to the President

Dear Mr. President,

As a former United States Marine Corps Sergeant who was shot and paralyzed from my mid-chest down on January, 20th, 1968 during my second tour of duty in Vietnam, and who has lived with the wounds of that war for the past forty one years, I am writing this letter to you deeply concerned with General Stanley A. McChrystal's request for a troop escalation in Afghanistan.

Escalating this war and deploying more of America's sons and daughters to this conflict is a huge mistake -- another Vietnam disaster in the making. We are at a crucial turning point Mr. President and the decision you are about to make in the coming days and weeks may very well be the most important decision of your presidency. I cannot begin to comprehend the thoughts going through your mind as you contemplate this difficult decision, the awful burden it must be.

Many of us who served in Vietnam promised ourselves long ago that we would never again allow what happened to us in that war to ever happen again. We had an obligation as citizens, as Americans, as human beings to raise our voices in protest. We could never forget the hospitals, the intensive care wards, the wounded all around us fighting for their lives. Those long and painful years after we came home.

In your recent address to the VFW on August, 17, 2009 in Phoenix, Arizona, you stated that the war in Afghanistan was a "war of necessity." I remember as I watched and listened to you that day wondering if you had any idea what you were getting us into, if you knew anything of Vietnam and the painful lessons I and others of my generation had learned from that war. You were three years old when I joined the Marine Corps out of high school in 1964, seven when I was shot and paralyzed in 1968, ten when I joined the Vietnam Veterans Against the War and began to protest against that war.

There were the trials and days and nights I spent in jail in my wheelchair feeling more like a criminal than someone who had once risked his life for his country, but I continued to speak. Perhaps it was survivors guilt or my own need to be forgiven and keep others from coming back like me, but as I sat before those crowds I began to open up my heart in a way I had never done before, sharing everything; all the horrors and nightmares, all the things I had locked deep inside of me, and had for so long been afraid to say. It was an extraordinary time Mr. President, an agonizing time, a time of great conflict, a time of great sorrow, and a time that would forever change the way we saw our country and the world.

In your book, The Audacity of Hope: Thoughts on Reclaiming the American Dream you spoke of that time, the Sixties, admitting that you were, "to young to fully grasp the nature of those changes, too removed to see the fallout on Americas psyche." I write this letter to you Mr. President as both a survivor and witness to that time and someone who must live with the consequences of a decision made by our government and it's leaders four long decades ago.

Physically and emotionally Mr. President I have struggled to live with the enormous challenge of being paralyzed. It is not an easy wound to live with. There are the bedsores and the catheters, the urinary tract infections and high fevers, the lack of sexual function, spasms, and terrible insomnia that torments you in the night. Each morning you wake up wondering how you're going to make it through another day. There is an entire body that does not feel or move from your mid-chest down and constantly you are lifting yourself up from your cushion in your wheelchair to keep your skin from breaking down.

You struggle to look normal, to fit into in this world again after all that has happened to you. It all seems so overwhelming at first Mr. President, but somehow you find a way to continue on. There are the anxiety attacks and the horrifying nightmares, the depression and thoughts of giving up. You're scared and you try your best to hide all that you've lost, all that you're going through every day, you can't move or feel anymore. It is an overwhelming and unspeakable injury Mr. President, but you go on. You do your best. You've got to keep living. You've got to keep getting up every morning no matter how crazy it all seems.

The years pass and you're still alive. You're amazed that after all these years, all the frustrations and confinement, in and out of bed, hospitals, fevers, IVs, wetting your pants, soiling the sheets, nightmares, anxiety attacks, insomnia, that you are still here, still in this world. Yet you continue on to make the best of what is left. You try to sit proudly in your wheelchair everyday trying not to lose your balance. It is amazing how normal a person can look if he only tries. You do your best to get back into life again but you know deep down inside that nothing will ever be the same, that you have lost more than most people could ever imagine, sacrificed more for your country, short of dying, than most of your fellow citizens could ever comprehend. It is a horrifying wound.

You watch your friends and fellow veterans die year after year from alcohol, drugs, suicides, a shot gun blast to the face, a car crash, an over dose, festering bed sores, toxic shock syndrome, pneumonia, homelessness, destitution and the loneliness of being forgotten. You see it all and you know that there is no flag, no parade, no welcome home that can ever make up for what you and the others have lost, for all that you have seen and endured; all those speeches, Memorial Days, Fourth of July fireworks, slogans and rhetoric about freedom and sacrifice and how, "necessary" this or that the war was, and If we did not stop them there than they would surely come to get us here.

It's way too much for a young man to see -- way too much for anyone to comprehend. Yet you go on. You do your best to block it out, to focus on the beauty of life -- the more positive things. You are amazed at the resiliency of the human spirit. You tell others how grateful you are to be alive, how you believe your wound is a blessing in disguise. And though that may be true, there are still moments in the early morning as you lie alone in your bed, slowly awakening to the wound one more time. You think, you ponder, you reflect on all that you have lost -- all those years, all that sorrow -- they come flooding back. For all the healing, despite all that you are now grateful for, all that you cherish and love; for all the goodness and kindness, despite the beauty of this still very beautiful world and all the hope and promise that it represents. But it lingers, that sorrow, that sadness. If but briefly for all that was lost for all that can never be again.

~ Ron Kovic

 

Comments

[PrairieView]

Welcome home, Ron. I was infantryman in Vietnam in 1968 and proudly served with VVAW afterwards. Your words are my thoughts. Your many sacrifices are truly appreciated. Peace and Love, bro.

[Apov]

Thank you, Mr. Kovic. Your are a true patriot.

[wsblake]

More eloquent words from a "real" American hero; words that all of the Bushs's ,Cheney's ,Krystals, Hannitys and O'reillys will sneer and smirk at, because they don't get it and never will.

[koleso]

"Amidst a cluster of gray's...

...Hope: an unfolding lullaby for the soul."

We can only Hope for the Truth to win.

Ron,......­..........­..........­...... Thank You!

[Walter Chessy]

It is good to see that you are still serving this country, even now. Semper Fi!

[musselmanm]

Thank you Mr. Kovic. It sure brings back the outrage at such a treasure we gave away and are doing again. The worst month in the 8 years for American deaths.
You are right, we need to start to organize again.
What are we trying to force down the throats of the people in these third world countries? Our Religion? our Capitalism? Seems Opium is their Capitalism. What are we trying to do? Eliminate the Taliban so Al Quida will have to go to Syria?
Lets jusst ease on down the road and learn another tragic lesson.

[mcartri]

Sadly Ron, it appears Obama will send more "Ron Kovics" to Vietnam II. Bush said our troops died for a noble cause in Iraq. What lie will we tell about their deaths in Vietnam II?

[Netizen]

Ron, nice to see a post from you. Unfortunately, I do not think Mr. Obama gets it. Look at the people he surrounds himself with. But thanks for the effort in writing an open letter, and for all you have done and endured.

[ljb860ljb]

As a Viet Nam Vet (Oct '65 - Sept '68) who was wounded 3 times I agree... this is not the war we want to fight. This war is for oil access just as the multiple gulf wars have been for oil. Get out now while we still have time.

[Dunelm]

Excellent post. One of the generals under President Eisenhower (I think his name was Ridgeway) advised his president against escalating the war in Vietnam--Eisenhower listened, and then in his farewell speech warned against the "military-­industrial complex." Today, so much profit is attached to never-ending wars by the "merchants of death." Let's hope President Obama sees the futility of fighting a guerrilla war in such terrible terrain.

[Bosely]

I too am a Vietnam Veteran with a disability, though mine is psychological. I am sure Mr. Kovic is sincere in his opinion. I just wonder why he has not spoken out until now. By comparison, Iraq has been much more of a Vietnam-like war than Afghanistan. Though it is not widely known by the general public, Vietnam was our countries first mercenary war for Corporate America. There was a lot of oil in the Gulf of Tonkin and a lot of private companies making millions as support services for the military. It would seem natural to protest Iraq for the same reason. Oil more than anything else appears to be the primary reason for out invasion. However, comparing Afghanistan to Vietnam does not seem very logical. Afghanistan was a war we did not start on our own. Perhaps troop escalation is the wrong strategy, but it seems to me 9/11 is justification enough for us to be there.

[JohnDewey]

Mr. Kovic has never stopped marching and speaking against illegal and insane American wars.

You may not have seen his actions & words publicized widely in the conventional media, but that's par for the course when it comes to people on the left. If a leftist, no matter how well-informed & credible, opposes American policy and refuses to go along with the corporate Democratic Party, they are labeled as kooks and kept out of the public eye. When right-wingers hang tea bags on their hats, wave illiterate signs & pretend they understand the Boston Tea Party or American history in general, the media expresses fascination and labels them a patriotic movement.

Don't believe me? Try Googling any of the following, just for a start:

Ron Kovic Iraq
Ron Kovic Central America
Ron Kovic protest

[yankee011]

Nicely said Ron.

[kendraro]

Thank you, Ron. If your words can't do it I don't think anything will. I am wondering why we should even go along with the meme that this is a difficult choice for the president. It seems like a no-brainer to me. Our job is done there. Bring them home. He campaigned on it, we elected him to do it, let's get it done.

[FirstShirt]

God bless you Sergeant. Semper Fi from and old soldier.

I agree. Get them out...now.

[EllieDee]

I have been blessed to know Ron Kovic for the past 20 years and I am always astonished by his courage, his integrity and his extraordinary commitment to preventing the horror with which he will always have to live from happening to others -- both soldiers and civilians. He is an inspiration and a challenge to us all. When I think of what he lives through every day and every night, I am humbled and my little problems show themselves to be just that -- little problems. I love you, Ronnie Kovic -- no retreat, baby, no surrender.

[cirrus]

I give thanks that Ron Kovic has remained alive - seemingly through sheer force of will - so he can continue to enlighten and inspire. He is a real American hero who transcends US politics to address the needs of all humanity for peace and true security.